Little Pieces of Happiness...

The lie of the land.

2012-01-26T07:36:00.000Z

Well we're experiencing a fair amount of turbulence here on the home front. Things are up in arms for everyone it it seems. Where to start....

Well N is the one to start with I think and he is struggling with college. He stays up late into the night (or all night!) then cant get up for college. We have taken several calls from the college about it but what can I do? He is 16 and if he wont get up I cant make him. I lost any control I had over him a long time ago. When he is in his logical/sensible mode he can be very rational about his sleeping, college, partying, smoking etc but he just cant carry out his ideas. All mouth, no trousers I believe the saying is. As a parent it is frustrating and heartbreaking to watch. You just cant tell him. At this stage it is looking around 50/50 for the likelihood of him staying in college, depending when you ask him *sigh*

Abi is having her own little crisis of confidence after getting a D on her last Math exam. She got a C on her first exam and would need to get a high C this time to ensure an overall C but it doesn't mean its impossible. However she is now resigned to failing miserably and is talking of doing a level 2 course instead or even dropping out and doing floristry. Her maths tutor said outright that she should have stayed the full time oin the exam, berated her for not reading it properly and said she might want her to resit, (incidentally Im not best pleased with her right now) at the opposite end of the scale is a friend who said she could just see Abi working in a little florist and that she didn't need any exams. *sigh* best on intentions but both so meddlesome. All Abi's initial confidence has gone and she is reluctant to even do her maths - its a bit of a coping mechanism with her; a stress reaction. Who knows what she will do but she has 5 months to get herself back on track for exam number 3.

Emma is just embarking on an exciting new adventure in the form of GCSE'S from Home Ed Partners. Its a little early but Em can start slow and work at her own pace. She initially reeled off 8 courses: Math, English, Chemistry, Physics, Spanish, French, Art and Food Tech. The last two were, I thought, impossible for Home Educators but HE Partners provide both. She'll go up there one Wednesday a month and the rest of the time she'll work at home. It is exciting but also it means stepping up her effort, now that will be a tough one as distractability and low perseverance are real problems for her.

Seb is reading more and more now and I am pleased that he is progressing so well. I still have some worries which I'll try and blog about separately but mostly he is making progress. He is on ORT Yellow (stage5) which is great and he is reading other bits, including his own school work to which means he can work slightly more independently. Not too much because his concentration doesn't hold for long but he is trying. He has crusty eyelids at the moment due to some sort of infection or another. I took him to the Dr 3 times now and he has had different creams. Only none of them have worked and I am convinced its a fungal thing which the Dr finally agrees with and has prescribed accordingly, just hoping it works because it looks pretty unpleasant.

Lucas is up and down. He has another ear infection which seems to be heading towards his chest as there is a distinct rattle. Sounds like its more in his throat currently though so we'll see. He has antibiotics which he hates but may just do the trick. His moods are up and down. When he could sit, and then use the walker he was relatively content but very quickly he tired of that and was frustrated again. Now he wants to pull himself up, he wants to stand unaided and even to take steps. None of these things are things he can do. I dont know, never before have I had a baby who was so hard to 'satisfy' or so complicated to understand.

DH is doing ok in his own workaholic way. He is struggling with the lack of car purely because he cant work so long and hard as he likes to. He has his sweet moments but he is a bit like a bear with a sore head most of the time. On top of this he has made several losses lately by pricing his jobs so low. Whilst he cant go on like that he is getting in a tizzy because he thinks if he puts his prices up people wont employ him. I try to reassure him but nothing is calming him down. The car thing is putting more pressure on him so he is a little like a pressurised container waiting to explode right now. We have seen another car we like but we are just waiting to see if we can afford it once the end of the month and rent day has been and gone.

As for me, Some days I wish desperately it wasn't morning, other days I am ok and make it through. I am a bit like one of those people who are melodramatic and melancholy about love and life ;all what-ifs and if-onlys but the other part of me tells myself to get a grip and dry up a little bit so Im floating precariously between the two. What I have done though is hired a mothers help. It started as a rent-a-granny idea to help with Lucas and Seb and ended up with a friend in dire need of cash, any cash to help me. It seems like an incredibly luxurious overindulgence just saying it, but in a time of no family support and the decline of extended family and community support networks it feels like there is no choice. No wonder women everywhere are cracking under new-baby strain and PND! It has made my week far easier, Seb is getting educated and the baby care is shared somewhat (and seems easier anyway somehow with another person here)

That just about covers us all I think and puts you in the picture, and its one less post in my Drafts folder.

Car-less and Crazy

2012-01-09T23:51:00.005Z

This week has been completely crazy and I've barely stopped to catch my breath. With no car to get us places I've had to stay in, walk or catch buses. Its been a learning curve to say the least. When I lived in Devon I went out and walked every single day, and in Lincoln too. Here its trickier as getting to town takes 25 mins with little people and the bus for Seb, Em and Me is £8.35. Eeek! I do walk to the HE group and the baby weigh-in which is not so far and gets me out a couple times a week but other than that I haven't ventured far.

I went to the weigh-in clinic this week to see how much Lucas weighed. I know it doesn't matter but I like to know. He is just off 18lbs so has done what they are 'meant' to do and doubled his birth weight by 6mths.
He is loving his food so I cant say Im surprised. However I did make a big mistake which has set us back somewhat. I added a small amount of milk (a cup of tea) to my diet with no negative effects, and then offered him a small amount(a teaspoonful of organic yoghurt), again with no obvious negative effects so I went whole hog and we both consumed dairy as normal. Just 3 days later he was screaming, gassy, sick, bunged up and refusing food. His Excema has flared up too, and more has appeared. It was the most horrendous three days I've had in a while.
There is another tooth brewing next to his first which I suspect is causing some misery as it breaks through and with this and the slow recovery from milk he is now off his food and wont put a spoon in his mouth - not good when a week ago he was almost feeding himself. He is managing the whole baby-led weaning thing though but it means he is hungrier all over again because far far less is going in.

Mmmmm, broccoli and parsnip.

Still no more news on our car either which is annoying. We wrote the letter (as per T.S advice) and his last day is tomorrow. Then its on to the next step, whatever that is. Tomorrow looks like a busy day and I still haven't had time to complete the other posts I have in draft, but Im too tired now.

Mobile and Munching

2012-01-09T23:14:00.000Z

24 Weeks at the breast - success :)

2012-01-09T19:09:00.001Z

*When ever I write posts like this, someone always manages to be offended *sigh*! However, I want to begin by saying, I am not criticising anyone else's choices, desires or beliefs. I dont want to talk about right and wrong here, most issues contain varying shades of grey. We all own our own feelings and stories and mine have a right to be told, just as much as anyone else's story.*

When I was pregnant I vowed that if I was able to breastfeed to 6mths I would blog about it. Of course when I made this pact with myself I didn't really think I could do it. To begin let me say I have bottle-fed my 4 children. and this was for a combination of reasons. However I felt like id failed as a mother and longed to be a breastfeeder this time.
We have come a long way since formula milk manufacturers could promote formula as an acceptable alternative to breast milk - but the message is subconsiously still there. One advert showing at the minute says "once they are six months SMA follow-on milk gives a baby vital nutrients they need". So implying, mama milk isn't good enough after this age. Setting aside here a women's right to choose, how is it helpful to suggest that breast milk isn't right for babies over 6months. Back in the day when there weren't bottles and sterilisers women fed their babies for as long as necessary. They didn't have other options and if they couldn't or chose not too, they called in a wet-nurse who could.
Over time though, with the invention of bottle feeding tools and with the media to promote them we have come to forget what was once natural and acceptable; instead are subconsciously enticed by a substitute that does the job for us,along with devices to administer this formula - all saving us time. Apparently. It is no longer the norm to breastfeed (though I feel the tide is turning). Breasts are splashed willy-nilly over page 3 and top shelf magazines, yet images of breastfeeding are banned on Facebook. What's wrong with that picture?!?!
My mother never breast fed. Neither did my grandmother. My friend 'cant be faffed with all that' and regularly comments to me sarcastically 'mmmm, sounds delightlful'. It is just not something women want to do these days.Not only that but with the government pushing to get women out of the home and in to work, with women becoming more career focused and less interested in the home, and with the advent of labour-saving tools and the belief in gadgets to get things done, it is easy to see why bottle-feeding caught on. Even I used to love buying cute little bottles and sterilisers, and all those bottle feeding tools.
However my reasons for not succeeding, are ultimately lack of support. These days women who have had babies are rarely supported by family and in the community. As we have seen the decline of the extended family, and seen families move further away from each other, its obvious why women are left to their own devices. Women nowadays dont tend to grow up seeing grandmothers, mothers, aunts, or sisters breastfeed . They no longer know how to do it. And then there is the time required for breastfeeding. It is no longer accepted that women need time to just feed their baby because nowadays they have to keep the house, run kids to numerous clubs and social events, possibly even work. All by themselves with no-one to rely on.
Which brings me to Lucas.

Despite what I others have said, Ive always felt a failure for not breastfeeding my other children. For me, its feels like I have let them down and failed to give them the best. "Well I bottle fed and my kids are ok" is one of the most common things said to me when I mentioned how I longed to breastfeed. Fair enough, I've used that line too but lets look at that. All my kids have eczema, and other allergies, all were ill as children. Was it linked?-who knows! Only time will tell. One report, as flawed and unlikely as it is, did claim it protected from Autism. Hmmm, but I do wonder if Lucas will manage to miss that clearly dominate ASD gene but thats a whole other post..
I was lucky enough that on hearing my desire to breastfeed this time, my lovely friend A began a phone dialogue with me about how breastfeeding worked. It was the first positive step towards breastfeeding.
Lucas knew exactly what do do and immediately latched on when he was born. But I following the advice I was given by A and right from the beginning to try and get it right. Even with the 'breast is best' slogan that is doing the rounds, it doesnt prepare you for what breastfeeding is really like. Breastfeeding is hard work;physically, emotionally, and mentally. This is why you need support. It is ok (normal even) to feed all the time, to feel tied to the sofa/bed, to wonder if you will ever get your life back and to worry constantly what's normal. Mothers these days dont know what to do, dont have support and dont know how to look after themselves end up just end up feeling its too hard and quitting. Nothing really prepares you for the way breastfed babies are. If you breastfeed your baby will probably feed more regularly and that was what I struggled to figure out. I had to accept that with breastfeeding its normal to feed probably 2 hourly, but its ok to feed every 1/2hr, or 4 times an hour - thats just how it is.
Three things gave me the sticking power; First, and I suppose most importantly, was my absolute determination to do it no matter what. And I had it fairly tough compared to some: thrush, mastitis, declining milk supply, oversupply, latch issues, fussiness and milk intolerance, nursing strikes, slight tongue tie, a stubborn snacky crying baby - yes this could have destroyed my success, But I was determined.
Second, though it is almost as important. Being told over and over that I was getting it right, that what Lucas was going through was normal and common. A phoned me daily, then every other day and then weekly. Now its about once a fortnight/month or if I need to check something out that some idiot health professional told me. In an age where women often dont have readily accessible points of support, what A provided, free of charge, was invaluable.
Thirdly, was surrounding myself with people who had breastfed, or were currently feeding. When you are struggling with breastfeeding, the last thing you need is to have a mother, friend or professional turn around and tell me to give him formula. People treat it like its some magic thing; to cure your baby and end sleepless nights. Regular feeding and sleepless nights are normal for goodness sake, its a baby not a robot. I was lucky enough to have several people in our HE group to model my breastfeeding on. I had the benefit of their experience and knowledge.
So how was the reality? The first 6months were incredibly hard in ways I never expected. I am tied to this child, day and night. He cries - I feed, he whines - i feed, he pulls at my top - I feed, it looks like lunch time - I feed. And its not nicely spaced like when you bottle feed, no set meals or routine. He's hungry a lot, and I usually feed every 1.5 - 2 hours, or more. Im getting used to it now.
Its taken a while to accept the lack of routine. I've had to learn to accept the sitting around, the lack of getting stuff done, the being tied to the baby. And I've had to deal with all the issues both with him and me that have made it harder. Some days I truly hated it and the only thing that kept me going was the determination that this was best. I pretty much crossed off each day with the mantra, "just one more day" which turned into a couple weeks, then 6 weeks, 3 months, 4 months and now 6 months.To this point it hasn't been 'the most enjoyable thing ever', no, its been flipping hard. I've had to eat and drink more, I've had to rest more, I've given up milk to feed him. I take fennel tea(urgh!) and fenugreek and regular pumping to keep my milk up. It sounds terrible doesn't it?
But then there are those moments that are so incredibly lovely. Like when he is nestled cosily and suckling whilst holding my hand, those moments at night where he reminds me of a joey crawling to its mothers milk as he wriggles across the bed to reach my breast. There are the times when he is sitting there 'talking' to you then suddenly nose-dives to your breast, trying to find your nipple. And the times in the supermarket when I am feeding him and a lovely old lady pats me and says "well done dear, you are doing a good thing" His toothless grin, his gorgeous chunky legs,- all the stress has been so worth it. Now he is six months old things suddenly(literally) seem to be easier. For a start he is eating solids now and thanks to his baby walker he is mobile. He has a tooth too so its yet to be determined whether he will try to take chunks out of me, and whether our breastfeeding relationship continues. However I finally feel like I have done it, albeit with more trials and difficulties. This baby has finally been given what all of my others should have had, were it not for lack of support. I can finally say, I HAVE breastfed successfully.

a Link for the tough days.

2012-01-07T12:29:00.000Z

I saw THIS link posted on facebook by Merry and I just love it.So here it is for those tough parenting days.

Cars, Kids and Life

2012-01-05T15:27:00.002Z

Wow, that's some serious wind we've got going on here in Somerset. We havent had that kind of weather for a while. As long as I can remember I've loved being out in the wind and have quite vivid memories of walking to school on windy days and loving the feel of the wind through my clothes; I felt like I was flying.
Wind doesnt seem to do anything to my kids, well not the girls. Seb seems to be pretty hyper, but he is ALWAYS hyper so that doesnt count.
Things here are a bit stressful after a huge car disaster. DH bought a new car, hang on, I told you all that. Anyway so we noticed the day after we bought it that there was an oil leak, we couldnt take it to the garage until Monday due to it being New Year and after they stripped it down and looked through it it seems our engine is completely knackered :( Its apparently a fault with 2.2 deisel engines on Espace's that at about 80,000 miles they go wrong and seize up). We cant even drive it because they blow up. Literally . To get a new replacement engine is £4,100 and even that will go wrong - and a design flaw means that you cant put any other engine in the chassis. After speaking to Renault they confirmed they didnt recommend replacing it and the guy who sold us it was a private owner and so it was 'sold as seen' and has a service dated only 1 week prior to our purchase giving it a clean bill of health. Basically we have lost everything we paid for it (£3,500!!!) AND dont have a car for the foreseeable future. The garage did a temporary fix on it but advised us not to drive it and to sell it quick. DH is looking for heaps of hair brained ways to dispose of the car which is not useful and would result in more trouble, but I can see why he'd be tempted. I truly don't know what we are going to do about it just yet but we cant keep it. I don't know how we'll sell it. And I dont know how we'll get another. STRESS!!!
*sigh*
Lucas still has a snotty nose. He is otherwise in good spirits though and finally has the beginnings of a tooth poking through his gum. Cute.
Nathan and I are heading for a huge collision on several issues after he informed me he might give up college but mostly he isn't here to argue with so that's on hold.
And school work has begun in earnest; my kids are thrilled -NOT!
So muddling on and getting through is what we are doing, good job I am the persevering type!

Exams

2012-01-02T20:53:00.001Z

So here we are in 2012, Hello 2012!
I even managed to get to the end of yesterday without planning anything. That a big achievement for me but then Lucas has been particularly helpful in breaking me of my neurotic planning obsessions. However today I couldn't resist and have been thinking about the coming year.
Abi only has 19 weeks until her French Exam, 21 weeks until Bicton is finished and only 23 weeks until her final maths exam. Then she is done and finished completely. Eeek. All this next 19 weeks will be about is French, lots and lots of french. I am going to buy her the 3rd GP book and a couple revision books.

I have also begun to make enquiries about Emma doing exams. Although we arent in a desperate hurry to work on exams (she is only 11) I wanted her to think about what options she has so that she can start to think of ideas. We ended up narrowing its all down to the possibility of the following 8: Maths and English(these are must haves) physics, chemistry, French, Spanish, Food Tech and Art. There was also some interest shown in RE and Economics but she remains undecided. We only know of one place to do food tech and its in Wales, but it is doable. They are doing Food Tech and Art on the same day so it would mean driving up, staying over then doing lessons. There is no time limit so she could reasonably take her time. Anyway, we need to go for a visit and have a look around, speak to the teachers and then decide. Im imagining she will take them and French at 13, her other subjects she'll begin at 13 and take at 14/15/16 depending on how fast we approach them. I am still waiting on calls from other centres to see if they accept IGCSE exams and what the cost may be.So a busy few months and years ahead of us. Wish me luck.

The Versatile Blogger Award...

2012-01-01T23:05:00.000Z

Big Mamma Frog from Home Education at The Chicken Shed just nominated me for this award:

Thankyou BMF :)

The rules of this award are :

Thank the person that nominated you with a link back to them.
Tell everyone seven things about yourself.
Pass this award on to 15 newly discovered blogs and let them know that they’ve received an award!

So, 7 things about myself....

I love to write lists. Lots of lists, about everything. And if I mess up, or make a mistake, or (horror of horrors) someone else writes on my list, I rewrite it.
I can write backwards and upside down. Spooky.
My favourite book is The Dark Is Rising Sequence, by Susan Cooper.
I am a compulsive book buyer and all my books are sorted by subject and size order.
I cant swim or ride a bike.
I am not very good with people (dont like them that much,lol) and dont 'do' crowds.
I was home educated too.

So 15 blogs I love.....

Adventures of the Road

Views From The Crows Nest

Path Less Taken

Ok, so not quite 15, and mostly not new ones either. But all worth reading :)

Another New Year.

2011-12-31T23:10:00.001Z

I categorically hate New Years Eve, I have to say. For the most part it is another excuse to drink to much, be too loud, kiss lots of people and let off far more fireworks than are really necessary, if ever fireworks were necessary at all. Yeah, I know, bah humbug! LOL
I just dont like it. What I also dont like is the fact that as you enter a new year, that's another year gone. Its hit me hardest with Nathan this year. It makes me sad that he isn't here for New Years Eve, and its silly because he drives me insane and often I like when he isn't here . He wasn't here last year either but this year he has been gone since 27th December and wont be back until the 2nd of January - he isn't one of those boys who thinks to call his Mama who misses him. Nope, he is a typical Aspie boy who is living his life without thinking of others - like all teenage boys really. I should be glad really because 5 years ago I couldn't see this moment at all. I couldn't see his independence, or his ability to catch buses, to stay away from his room(his 'safe place') or to be able to attend a smart attire only New Years Eve party. Im so proud of him, I really am. But I miss him.
Today whilst my grown up boy is off enjoying a party, Im a sad lady tucked up in bed, exhausted after nursing a sick Lucas for the last 48 hours. His cold isn't better, it seems worse in fact, and for the last two nights I've hardly slept and all he has wanted to do is breastfeed and sleep. All I want to do is sleep too, and I know I'll be asleep before the New Year reaches us. I am not even going to make resolutions this year as they are such a waste of time. This year I am just going to go with the flow because the flow is sweeping me along anyhow so I may as well just allow myself to enjoy the ride. That means no more neurotic planning and organising, at least for a little while.
My eyes are drooping and I need to sleep. All that remains to do is to wish everyone a Happy New Year, may this year be filled with happiness and may you be richly blessed.

Its That Time Of Year Again...

2011-12-28T23:01:00.001Z

As usual with the decorations down, the blog made over and Christmas food mostly eaten we have entered that post-Christmas-pre-New Year limbo. I always kind of feel like I am hanging around and waiting for life to commence again during this rather odd time of year. Usually I begin my planning and tend to wax lyrical about how different my year is going to be be and all the great things we'll do. This year I am not going to bother because, lets face it, there is going to be little that works out the way I want it too this year. Or probably any time in the near future.

This year for me saw a lot of sadness and happiness, lots of secrets and surprises, lots of letting go and holding on. I have made new friends and let go of old, I have learnt lots of things about myself and others and I have had to be very self sacrificing to stand a chance of making it though. I sometimes dont feel like I can do one more hour and yet somehow I get through the days and weeks. I am less complete but more grown up than I was, and I learnt that doing the right thing isnt always the same as doing what I want.

In 2011
Nathan made it through his GCSEs and into college
Abi got a C in her English exam.
And finally conquered maths.
Emma finally found some interests and took up reading
Seb's behaviour improved and he learnt fundamentally how to read
Lucas was born
DH got very busy with work and employed a worker.
I only managed to achieve one of the things on my list this year, which was my 101 things. Art, Learning and Time Out are definite no's and Im still working on the others.

For 2012
I still want that contentment. I still want to feel at peace with my life and my decisions. I still want to not want things I cant have. I just need to accept the now, forget the what ifs, if onlys, and maybes and just hold on to what I am lucky enough to have received.
I also want this year to be one where I stop feeling I have to apologise for who I am. All I ever seem to do is say sorry; Sorry for home schooling, sorry for breastfeeding, sorry for NOT breastfeeding, sorry for being a Christian, sorry for not being Christian enough. Sorry, Sorry, Sorry, arghhhhhhhh! I dont want to keep that up.

For my family I want:
DH to continue to have enough work and to figure out how to move forward with it.
Nathan to settle down a bit and take more responsibility.
Abi to get through her exams and into Kingston Maurwood
Emma to stop avoiding work.
Seb to really read properly
Lucas to crawl/walk!!!! ( I feel mobility may be the key to his happiness, and therefore mine)
Money would be nice too :)

May everyone get what they want this year xx

Christmas at 'Hotel Stanbury'

2011-12-27T21:01:00.003Z

'Hotel Stanbury' is a phrase used by my friend V who used to frequent our house when her daughter attended Uni in Exeter. (Oh I miss those days!) When she stayed she would be a fabulous help at entertaining whichever little person required it, I was reminded of it because my parents have been particularly good at that too this year.

So Christmas for us was exactly as I hoped it would be over all- it was marred by Lucas being ill beginning Christmas Eve and continuing even now. On Christmas Eve We spent about an hour in the afternoon getting the food ready for the Christmas dinner. I love to eat the big Christmas Eve as it kind of marks the start of Christmas and goes with the afternoon of cooking whilst supping mulled wine (or mulled apple juice in my case.) Nathan finally found his way home just in time for dinner after being AWOL for 6 days. We had our dinner followed by Christmas Pudding then the kids watched festive TV. I had a horrendous night of Lucas screaming and being very poorly.

Christmas day almost started at 1am when Seb woke and came in to us. He wouldn't settle in our room and DH ended up in his bed with him. Emma was also milling around at around 1 and 'couldn't sleep'. In the end everyone got back to sleep but were all still awake at around 6am and present opening commenced at 7am!We paused part way through opening to cook breakfast (bacon, egg, mushroom, pancakes - yum!) then finished opening before starting to assemble everything Seb had. Being Lego it took nearly all day! We cooked some buffet foods late afternoon and then people picked throughout the day. Lucas wouldn't touch his presents and we couldn't raise a smile at all. Everyone else seemed very happy with their toys though which was mainly books and weights for Nathan, DVDs and clothes for Abi, crafts and clothes for Emma, and Lego and DS/wii games for Seb. Lucas got lots of toys from PlayMerrily including rattles, bath toys and a beloved toy monkey. They each received £85 so were very impressed with that. Abi, Emma, Seb and Lucas saved theirs whilst Nathan added it to some saved money and bought a PS3.
Boxing Day was a first for me because I DIDN'T take the decorations down. But then I was pre -occupied with Lucas. In the morning we nipped out to get Nathan's PS3 as I said.Then we headed home for lunch. By late afternoon we could bare Lucas' upset any longer and took him to the walk-in centre to have him checked over. The Dr we were lucky enough to see was wonderful, really explained everything he was doing and what was wrong - ear infection, cold and viral cough - and was happy to listen to all my worries and happily looked at each issue to rule them out. Not an awful lot to be done for it though. No antibiotics, just calpol, but we had an answer at least. I also bought a breast pump as my milk was quickly declining because Lucas refused to feed.
Today we DID take the decorations down because I know once DH took my parents home it would be hard to get it done with just DH and I. We also bought a(nother) car today. I know, dont say it, blame DH!!!!! A Renault Espace which we pick up on 2nd Jan. Long time readers know all about DH tendency to buy cars which drives me mad. Hope I can drive it now. Other than that Lucas needed lots of TLC still, the kids played on the Wii and we pottered around doing not a lot.
And that was Christmas :)

Merry Christmas

2011-12-24T23:08:00.000Z

Well all the houses are done and displayed, presents wrapped and kids in bed. Hope you have a wonderful Christmas.

Nearly Time

2011-12-23T22:19:00.000Z

So the mince pies are bought. Yes I said bought!! Along with pre-prepared roast potatoes, the meat which is defrosting and the Tesco Christmas pudding. All delivered today and stuffed into cupboards so that we can have an easy Christmas. All the presents have arrived except one final present which has failed to be delivered by Amazon -Bad Amazon, I am not impressed. Still, it has one final day to make its appearance.
We are doing Christmas dinner tomorrow night which we have done for several years. We would eat dinner, drink mulled wine then I would go to Christmas Mass. I love Christmas Mass and find it so magical and thoughtful. This year I rather suspect I am not going to Christmas Mass as Lucas is unlikely to want to go. Next year though!
We have been doing our advent calendar from Activity Village and tomorrow once finished I will photograph them all in their glory for all to see :) We have baubles and candles to decorate tomorrow too, flan to make and Christmas Dinner to get through.

So I guess you could say I am ready for the festive season to begin :)

Re-caps

2011-12-21T02:38:00.004Z

Another little recap of what we've been doing is in order I think, if Lucas stays asleep long enough!
On Thursday we had a slow morning then went over to Wincanton to deliver our cards and say hi.
Friday was a rather busy day. DH actually took the day off work ( I know, Im still in shock) so he could come to HEY. We nipped to Tesco to grab the food we wanted then home to pick up cards before heading out to HEY and getting ready for our production of The Gruffalo. It was never going to be a serious production, no one is that kind of person that would organise it. But we did dress up, practice and make sets for the play. We invited several families to come if they would like and we had four turn up. It went well and there was food afterwards - lots of fun. I was flagging by the end though.
Saturday ~~was~~ felt like a long day. DH left for work at 7. I left the house at 8.15am, drove around delivering cards then posted card, and had to get all the kids to Wincanton by 10am then home again. After a couple hours at home I had to head out at 1pm, pick up the kids from Wincanton then drive home again. (60 miles in all!!!)Then it was a long afternoon until DH got home at 4. Lucas also got sick again. Apparently this cold seems to come and go a few times before it clears.
On Sunday DH cleaned windows, my car and pressure washed the front of the house which was seriously dirty after nearly a year of weathering (and the odd egg throwing that occurred). Other than that I started sniffling with the cold too.
Monday and Tuesday were really hard as DH was gone 7 -6 and Lucas was particularly sickly and we were all miserable. Tuesday afternoon we did have a visit from R and her kids for an hour. I just wish my son slept more because I spend far too often in that vague, spaced out state and I hate it.
Later on today Lucas, Seb and I are off to Devon for a couple days and then are bringing my parents back with us. Hopefully the drive will be ok as I haven't driven that far since the small person arrived. Right, must get some sleep before he wakes again.

Dreary.

2011-12-14T21:53:00.001Z

Its been a dull dreary day here and left us all feeling a bit flat. DH and I had a falling out the night before so weren't speaking this morning - the lack of communication was not a good way of achieving anything on my to-do list though. He woke late, didn't do half the jobs on the list then had to rush off to work.
Lucas was a proper misery guts all day and got on my nerves quite frankly. He is just so frustrated with everything right now. He wants to hold/reach/touch things and screams when he cant. Now he can roll over he wants to crawl which isn't going so well. He rolls onto his front, slings his arms backwards, pushes onto his knees then moves along face first - funny to watch but uncomfortable for him. He can sort of sit but he screams because his toys dont do what he wants them too, and he likes to stand but hates that he cant walk. He is just so eager to get going. He made us laugh tonight in the bath though because he was sucking the rubber duck like a pacifier - he was very cute.
I discovered I didn't need to have the Father Christmas conversation with the kids after all as Abi told me that the girls piano teacher had told all last Saturday. Not sure Im happy about that but, well, it saves me the job. They are happy to play along though and Abi did say that even though she knows, she still likes to listen for sleigh bells on Christmas Eve. It led to a nice conversation about the spirit of Christmas so it was good.
Seb, Lucas and I nipped to Tesco this morning in between sleet showers and picked up a few bits and pieces then it was home and I walked with Lucas whilst the kids watched Incredible Journey (the original) which got the thumbs up from them because it made them cry. O-k-a-y, weird children!! Lucas finally crashed out at 2 and slept till 5 but it didn't stop him screaming and stropping from 5-8. DH took Seb to his Beavers Christmas party whilst I ....yep, you guessed it, walked with Lucas. I finally bathed him at 8 and he is now sound asleep beside me.Peace! (well for an hour or so, anyway)

Tis The Season...

2011-12-13T11:27:00.000Z

So its that time of year again. Thankfully after a brief time a few years ago Christmas was being advertised in August the media are back to holding off until around October time. Once started though there is no stopping them. I think the advert I hate most right now is the new Toys R Us advert "I wanna be a Toys R Us kid" Im loathe to share it but I want you to know why I hate it.

Seb loves this advert and tells me that seeing it makes him want to be a Toys R Us kid. And being the ~~stubborn~~ ~~pigheaded~~ wilful determined type that he is,no amount of discussion of fat cat corporations or media hype will dissuade him from his stance. Of course every parent in the land is faced with these potential Toys R Us kids and it's hard not to feel obliged to make their dreams come true at Christmas Time. Im just as guilty of encouraging it as the next person. In years gone by when the Argos/Index/Tesco book came out each August I would sit with each of the kids in turn whilst they repeated that well known mantra "I want..." and I dictated their festive request narrations onto paper. Then as every parent does, I strived to get most, if not all, the things on the lists because THIS was the way to make them happy.
And it doesn't stop there! You also have those delightful festive cooking programmes from the likes of Delia and Nigella which show you have to have THE perfect Christmas meal. You of course know that to do this you must buy 6 types of meat, provide at least 7 choices of veg, and finish with a home made Christmas pudding which you should have made in July. And if you don't do that you FAIL!!! Those Christmas adverts tell you the best place to shop is Tesco/Asda/Sainsburys - Hell, anywhere, as long as you buy all those ~~expensive~~ 'special' foods that you NEED for Christmas.
And to do all these things and create that Christmas you must take out a loan, (at 187% interest APR if you read the small print), which you can then pay back over 5, 10 or 15 years and its ok because you have the ability to add to it each year. Yay! And maxing out your credit cards is no problem at all because you can just transfer them at 0% interest for the whole year so spend what you like because THAT is how to make a perfect Christmas.

**Sigh**

Gradually the materialism that I had somehow been gripped by (bearing in mind I have never been like that till the last 10 years) slipped away and I realised that I didn't want that for us. So we stopped getting any catalogues and tried to encourage the muting of adverts where possible and the ignoring of the I wants (Clearly it doesn't stop every request - see above) but it has helped immensely. So I started saying what would you like and more and more they would say "I dont know". The trend has been towards books-Nathan, craft - girls, and Lego - Seb. It makes buying easier and this year has been even better- all the kids requested one or two things each. Emma even went as far as to say "oh I like it when you surprise me, probably crafts or books or something". We think we'll keep her!
And even better, this year we have done it all with no credit at all. Even with DH starting his own business, we haven't borrowed for anything business related and we are are determined to extend this to all areas of our life. I think a lot of good has come from DH burning lots of credit bridges because now he has to manage his money. This has extended to Christmas too and we have just found a way to manage.
Food is the other potential fail point and Im making it easy this year. Our dinner works best if we eat Christmas Eve. We prepare potatoes in the morning, Aunt Bessie kindly donates carrot/swede mash, roast parsnips and Yorkshire puddings, we do pre-packed sprouts, gravy from a packet and a Tesco basic Christmas pudding(due to there being no milk). Christmas day starts with pancakes (we cook and freeze them at an earlier date or just freeze the batter until needed) then we have an all day buffet which only involves sticking pizzas, chips, mini sausages and a few spring rolls in the oven. There are no expectations so no let downs, we dont do the big family dinner and this year we aren't even doing "must-see-every-friend-I-have-and-deliver-cards/presents" either; very few people are getting cards and even fewer are getting presents. This year its about us as a family, enjoying each others company, eating nice easy food, and for me remembering why I celebrate the season.

Coughs and Sneezes (and other things)

2011-12-12T23:02:00.000Z

Among others things its that time of year again when colds are rife. Having said that, with a family of seven its always that time of year! Lol. Lucas bless him has his first cold and isn't a good patient. I've been awake over 45 hours and I think I'm running on pure adrenalin now. On top of which with him off food again and snacking every 1/2hr I'm having a small(but manageable) breast milk crisis so am back to pumping again.

Emma has also come down with it quite badly, Abi less so but still ill and I seem to be doing best of all so far with only light sniffles. DH/Nathan/Seb seems to have escaped it I hope. Meanwhile Seb seems to have developed a weird athletes foot type infection on his eyelid!!!

We decided to walk to Abi's hospital appointment today not because I wanted the exercise, no, it was purely so the baby would shut up for two minutes, bless him. Twenty actually, it was heaven. Abis appointment went well. She has been diabetic for 5 years and finally I feel like I am reasonable ok with it now. She was their star pupil once again and managed a fabulous long range blood result (7.8)Yay!

We managed to get our Christmas Decorations up last Monday and I am reasonably impressed with them. I have a rather odd desire to have twinkly lights all over the house this year and have succeeded to a reasonable extent. I have discovered the more modern LCD lights give me migraines and are almost too bright. so we replaced them with traditional filament micro lights - pretty. The children kidnapped the remaining lights so our house somewhat resembles a golden glowing grotto now- its pretty though.

DS got into trouble for not turning up to lessons but managed to show the college up by getting a B in his Mocks in the course he never attends so has left him feeling smug and also more reluctant then ever to make an effort. Oh the joys of bright aspie children.

So Im starting to feel tired now at last. I'll leave you with osme pictures of our Christmas Deccies, Nature table and also a picture of this years Advent calendar printables from Activity Village that we've done so far.

Interesting Developments and other things

2011-12-09T23:36:00.003Z

A couple weeks ago I was struggling and at my wits end (again). A couple weeks on and things are changing in a good way - its those little changes that mount up to big ones!
Lucas was feeding constantly, I mean he was just driving me mad. I saw this family with a new baby, the mom just finished (bottle)feeding her baby and then passed her over to the siblings who happily cradled the cooing baby and literally I burst into tears. Why didn't I get one of those children? God, what are you playing at? Its not fair! (I know, whine, whine, whine!). All my baby ever does is cry, poo and feed, gah! But I took a look at him and he had changed after all. Suddenly he has learnt to roll over from front to back. Of course he now spends a fair amount of time head butting floor, lol, but that's ok. He likes to sit too, though needs to be held for stability still, but he can pick things up and put them in his mouth. And he can reach and grasp things held above his head. Its fabulous. He spends less time crying and more time 'talking' to us in his cute little way. On top of that in the last few days he has tried some food. We are going for the baby led weaning approach and he has already grabbed and gummed broccoli, cauliflower, carrot, sweet potatoes, parsnips, butternut squash, apple, banana, mango and (accidently) a bran flake, pasta and some rice. He loves it and was clearly ready for it even if he's not the recommended 6mth yet. Only thing we are finding is its not quick enough for his appetite so lots of frustration and tears; I think I am going to have to help the process with some spoon feeding. The slogan for baby led weaning is "The mush stops here" obviously someone forgot to tell Lucas as he mushes everything in his fingers before it even meets his mouth.
I finally got my hair cut too which, strangely, made a huge difference to how I felt about thinks. Who'd have thought it!! I grew my hair during the pregnancy but long hair just irritated me because its so thick, it was permanently greasy, and needed to be brushed and tied up. Now I have my usual shorter style which is lovely, low maintenance and clean!
Otherwise things have been pretty routine here. DH is doing a big job at some manor house near Dorchester which involves laying 5000+ edging bricks and it needs to be done before 6th Jan. The owner is a funny lady and wont have any work done on the place whilst she's in residence so its a tight schedule. It mean DH is doing longer hours than usual as it includes travelling so he leaves by 7am and doesn't get back much before 6 each night. Its not much fun really and I am haing to do a lot of the kids club runs which is hard work with a baby.
I haven't seen any friends during the week this week but did go to HEY on today. We are doing The Gruffalo play next week so the kids did another run through with scenery and costumes. I had a good time although its never easy to join in whilst Lucas needs me, although there are lots of offers of help. I did have a bit of a difficult time there this week as I had a situation that I didn't (still dont) know how to handle. Lucas was laying on a blanket for once, usually preferring to be held, and after being there a few minutes he began to be a bit 'shouty' in his usual way. He was talking and being heard, and was probably around 5-7 minutes from a strop, but was fine. I was talking to a new lady but had one ear on him and knew he was fine. However another parent came in and without asking she picked him up saying to him "oh your getting fractious lets go for a walk" and off she went. Well I was stunned to silence really and she was gone with him before I could react and I did get him back after about 10 minutes but I was not very happy. She is an AP parent and does love babies. She fed her children until they were quite old, never tells them no and never makes them do anything they dont want too, she also wishes she could have had more - not really relevant but it kind of is. She seeks out babies and is almost clingy with them. Maybe Im over reacting but I did not like how she was with Lucas at all. Anyway, so I didn't say anything and I dont know how to or what I'd say, but I am really not looking forward to next week :/
So the coming week is a busy one with appointments, courses, clubs and groups, DH away for long hours all week and lots to do. However it is pushing me back to a normality of sorts and helping to remind me of things I used to be very capable of doing before Lucas came to us.

Advent

2011-12-01T20:53:00.001Z

It appears that the festive season is upon us once more (Already!!!) It snuck up on us rather suddenly and Im not quite sure how. We were doing to do a craft a day this year for advent. - at least the little plan I had in my head said this was what we'd do. It doesn't seem likely somehow though; crafting and high maintenance babies do not seem to be a match made in heaven for me. *tries not to feel too jealous of AP/ baby-wearing mums who have content children AND time to do beautiful crafts*
Instead the best we can hope for this advent is an Advent Village from HERE. Some ceramic baubles, decorated candles and a Winter nature table. Anything else is a bonus which I will blog accordingly.

Things We Did

2011-11-30T22:15:00.001Z

Over the last few days there has been:

large scale junk modelling. Seb adores it and ever since he did some at HEY he has wanted to do it ALL the time. So far he has made a tank he can wear, a puppet theatre, a trap for his legos and a gun or ten.
Cooking. Emma has made cakes in particular Rocky Road that even I can eat using dark chocolate and dairy free spread. Yum! Plus Chicken noodle soup and a roast dinner.
Sewing. The girls have made pillows and trinkets for presents.
Shopping. I bought socks for little people who cannot wait until Christmas for them. Then there has been hats and gloves as the weather turns cold. The girls have bought presents for Christmas. And there was food shopping.
There have been friend visits too. L visited with her children which Seb loved, and we had a visit from R and her children too.
The girls went to visit friends near Gillingham for the day.
School work has been sparse (particularly from Seb) but there has been lots of practical stuff going on.
Lucas has been smilier than usual mostly :) but not sleeping any better yet.

Home Ed and Interviews!

2011-11-23T20:27:00.005Z

Argh! I just cant shake my "Im failing with homeschooling" depression. Lucas is still no better, cant be bothered to elaborate the point, just GRRRRR! But of course his sameness means little else is happening. Emmas homeschool is a constant path of negotiation at the minute. It kind of goes like this:

E: I dont want to do music any more.
Me:(annoyed we have been paying £12/half hour for the last two years just for her to drop it) Fine, I'll let S know. What a shame.
E: Its boring having to learn all these pieces
Me: But they are to teach you terms, scales and other things.
E: I do want to do music, just not what S is teaching.
Me: Well you have to do that or what's the point of paying her. If you stopped you wouldn't have anyone to teach you and you wouldn't be learning then.
E: I want to do stuff I like.
Me: Fine, I'll buy you some Christmas Carol books, a Disney book and you can do 3 days of S music and 3 of your choice.
E: OK.

Then there's her workbooks.
Me: You haven't been doing your workbooks.
E: They are boring.
Me: Well you need to do them
E: I like workbooks but there are too many. They are boring.
Me: How can we do them so you find them more interesting
E: There are too many in a week.
Me: OK, how about half one week and half the other?
E: OK.
We go through this negotiation process about every thing she needs to do. Usually with her doing less than I'd like and more than she'd like (i.e. nothing!!). She seems set to be the master of manipulation right now and I dislike it intensely. On top of which its bloody hard work.
Seb, meanwhile, is just stuck in his 'No!' phase. There are signs of reading being a little better (Yay!) but he just doesn't want to work. Reading Eggs is a big hit and I would definitely recommend it. I can pretty much coax him to do it on most days. Study Ladder on the other hand, is turning into a big waste of money as he need my input for the large percentage of his work and I cant input whilst Lucas is crying. I think it could work for Emma but until Seb reads he wont do well with it. Jump Ahead is middle ground, sometimes it's OK and the games are quite good, mostly though its cheesy and the educational value is very well hidden. So we are back to workbooks. I took everything out of his tray and just put in the minimum: Singapore Maths, Explode The Code, Singapore Science and a Sonlight reading book. I expect only a page of each workbook and 2-3 sentences of his reading book each day that we aren't going anywhere.. The whole thing takes less that 1/2 hour... when he co-operates. He doesn't cooperate all that often though. He seems to have stagnated with his reading and Im not sure if its lack of practice/lack of interest/or actual learning blocks that are causing the problem.I have started getting him to read to DH each evening. Just a few pages of his ORT book each night which I hope will be worthwhile. Also a friend recommended DK reading books on various topics and I spent nearly £50 on several of them from Amazon. We bought some about being a policeman, fireman and builder, as well as some about Star Wars, Indiana Jones and Lego city. He was impressed and hopefully he will be inspired once again. If not I may cry.
Abi had her Kingston Maurwood interview on Wednesday and by all accounts it went really well. We took her down to the campus for 12.45 for her tour and talk whilst the rest of us went into Dorchester for a while (and rediscovered a little shop I used to love). Then we headed back for 2pm for her interview and I took the others into the animal park and gardens whilst she was in her interview with DH. They had forgotten her which she felt disappointed about but I explained to her that the open day she attended was probably really busy and he probably saw LOTS of kids. The head guy seemed to like her though and took her seriously. She has her enrolment day next September when she will have to take any certificates she has received, show her science portfolio (again!) and bring animal work experience references she has gained. He was happy for her to sign up for the level 3 course and didn't feel it was too hard at all. So I think that's a success. Hoping for the next year to go smoothly and to prepare her as she loves it there. Oh and we had to chuck in a quick photo opportunity too:

With his big brother

Ready for her interview

Me too

Lucas and Me

Quick Fixes and Making Things Work

2011-11-20T20:08:00.002Z

There are so many parts of my life that I cant fix, its actually rather nice when I find a bit that I can fix, or at least improve on.
Bit by bit I am starting to get to understand how Lucas works, Following some(more) really difficult days with Lucas and his feeding I phoned my friend A who gave me some tips to try and told me to begin pumping(again) to keep my supply up. He is fussy at feeding, constantly distracted, crying to be put to the breast and only feeding for 3-5 minutes and I was really beginning to think he needed food. I got straight on to Google and discovered the 'four month fussies' which summed my little man up perfectly.
Advice is such a funny thing. On one hand you have people saying, 'oh he's hungry, give him a bottle', 'Try him on some food' and 'No we haven't had that' and you begin to think your baby is the only one doing that - something MUST be wrong. Then you type your issue into Google and suddenly everyone is going through it; quite reassuring at times.
So how to 'fix' him then:

Co-sleep so he can feed at night.
Feed when sleepy or as he wakes from napping.
Feed in a quiet place
Try a 'nursing' necklace
Express to keep us supply
Top up with expressed milk in a cup if he is particularly fretful.
Chill out (ROFL - this is me we're talking about)

He is slightly better today but still distractable. Everyone says it doesn't last. I hope not! In my bid to help nursing I have also discovered how to nurse him whilst standing and, even better, whilst walking around. What I find hardest is the screaming. Proper angry screaming; screaming when he wakes, screaming for sleep, screaming to feed, screaming for boredom. It doesn't end. *sigh* I just need this phase to be over with.
This week we also set up our cot so it was attached to our bed. We tried to buy a 'bedside' cot but kept being outbid so gave up. As DH is a man who can, he modified the cot bed so the base was flush with ours so now I can just grab Lucas when he wakes.

We have new uses for our household appliances too. Our vacuum cleaner runs at 8am, 11am, 2pm and 5pm but are we vacuuming? No! But the minute it comes on Lucas goes to sleep, its that instantaneous. And dour hair dryer dries hair, yes? In this house it defrosts freezers instead!
We spent yesterday tidying the bottom room (again!), defrosting aforementioned freezer - I did that after DH said "cant we just scrap it a bit" Err, no dear, we can't!, then went and did our pre-Christmas food shopping. It was mainly freezer stuff seeing as we had a newly defrosted and almost empty freezer, but we bought store cupboard stuff and used our Tesco vouchers so the bill was only half; probably a good job seeing as we spent £251. Eeek!I cant believe the price of food these days. This is still only enough to feed nine of us for three days over Christmas, and I didn't even buy Chocolate!

DH managed to burn his hand on Thursday by trying to throw petrol on a bonfire. I know- I told him it was a dumb thing to do too!! So he had to get his hand dressed on Saturday, then he had a reaction to the bandages so he had to go on Sunday too. Looks like he'll need to do this for about 2 weeks until its healed. Men!!!

Over the weekend I printed off all the bits Abi might need for Wednesdays interview at KM. I am in two minds whether some kind of personal statement and CV(record of achievement) would be a good idea. And do I take all her health documents or not, ponder ponder....

I have a list of other things a mile long that need to be done but Im not going to get there any time soon.

Making it through...

2011-11-17T21:27:00.001Z

Another few days have snuck(sneaked?) past me and for once I dont mind. I used to say I loved babies, now I can categorically say I most certainly do not!

So Monday was OK. Abi's exam was 'easy' - her words. Only one left to do now and she'll be done. We are thinking it might be in March if we can swing it but if not it'll be June. She has her Kingston Maurwood interview next Wednesday which we are all rather nervous about. She is organising certificates and school-work related stuff to show them. DH was off work for the occasion (and the fact that she needed to be at the exam by 8.30 am) but having him home was lovely. In the evening I had a bit of a showdown with one of Abi's tutors after she told Abi that level 3 course was like being hit in the face with a shovel and they didn't think she could do the work. That may be so (not saying it is, but it was one of the interview questions we had) but she should have phrased it better, or better still spoke to me directly and NOT passed the message via a 15yr old ASD child. All resolved now though.
Tuesday we were meant to have a friend visit only she pulled out at the last second, grrrr, so we went to clinic in the morning then just hung out at home in the afternoon. Abi had her eye appointment in the evening and we nipped into town whilst she was there.
Wednesday was a pretty rough day with Lucas. Its literally one speed bump after another with his latest being refusing to eat. *Sigh* Seb and I walked to cell group as I was in desperate need of fellowship and some happy faces. It was a 20 min walk there and then the same to come back. J has magic hands and Lucas slept most of the time we were there and all the way home. In the afternoon the kids had dentist appointments so whilst DH did that I nipped to the bank to get Abis documents varified so we could open her new account. We swung past the sorting office to pick up parcels we'd missed in the morning then home for a late tea.
Thursday morning Lucas persisted in his crying so Seb and I went into town for a while. We got home around 12, ate lunch then headed out again as we like to evacuate when the cleaners come. This time we went to Ham Hill and walked for a couple of hours or so. Hopefully the kids should all sleep well tonight. (yeah right!)

Whirlwind Weekend - Edited.

2011-11-14T08:30:00.002Z

*sigh* Im tired! Lucas does not believe in sleeping soundly at night, and he especially wont do it in his own bed. He much prefers skin to skin contact - great in summer, not so great in November, even if it is "the warmest November on record" (seriously, who measures these things!). Not only that but he wants snacks on tap, so if they aren't available he screams. Loudly.
So I've been up since 5am as Lucas loves to produce a dirty nappy(or two) at this time of day. And have been rushing around the place a bit madly so that I can get Abi up and ready for her second Maths exam today. DH has taken her as Lucas is still too restless plus Emma is having a visit for her first Science tutorial today. Instead I am sitting here praying and hoping for the best outcome. I am a tiny(huge) bit gutted that the lady who was going to do Spanish has pulled out so I need to find a tutor which is what I will try and fill my time with whilst I wait for Abi to get home.
This weekend has gone really fast. On Saturday DH took the girls to their tutoring whilst I stayed home with Seb.We ended up popping round to visit a friend then headed over to Morrisons which has recently been refurbished. Lucas was unsettled and cried most of the time so in the end we headed back and waited for DH to get home. We spent the evening sorting out Lucas' cot to make it into a 'bedside' cot. Seems easier given he spends so little time in there. Yesterday morning Seb and dh set about making the Christmas present Seb wanted to give the cats - he drew a cat house, with pictures of tools they'd need etc. Then him and dh built it from MDF

After that, a Sky installation, and a mini tantrum from me (which we are glossing over), we went into town and picked up some presents for various people from poundland, 99p shop and Wilkos. It took longer than I'd hoped so we dashed home for lunch then headed out to pick up a new (second hand) pushchair for Lucas. Its an old syle Britax one with reversible bucket seat and the lady who owned it has hardly used it so it really is as-new.

J came over to talk shop with dh when we got back so that took us to the evening which was a quiet one, for once, and an early night .
And so back to today :)

Things I wish I had known about newborn crying.

2011-11-11T22:39:00.004Z

When my first son was born nearly 17years ago it was the most wonderful day and taking him home from the hospital was fabulous; I was so in love with my little bundle of joy. And then the crying started.
This wasn't just the odd cry at bed time or because of hunger or pain this was just prolonged, seemingly purposeless, and so incredibly distressing. I tried everything to help him but in the end all he needed to do was cry.
My second and third children, both girls, didn't have this issue and so when my forth child, a son, was born I felt completely out of my depth and the crying was very difficult. I was teetering on the edge of post-natal depression and felt like this child just hated me. When Lucas came along I had forgotten all that and so imagine my horror when once again I was hit with this insane crying pretty much off and on through the evening and at night, any time between 3pm and 3am.
It started when he was 2 weeks old, almost to the day. It was as if someone had flicked a switch and he'd become so completely unhappy. Every day was the same, from 3pm onwards he became more and more unhappy until he was just screaming. At 5 weeks old I took him to the hospital after a particular bout. Initially they diagnosed reflux and gave us gaviscon even though many of those symptoms weren't there, then they told me it was colic, but by 11 weeks they said they just didn't know what it could be. He just seemed to need to cry.
Having checked he was otherwise healthy there was nothing for it but to accept his nature and try to minimise the impact of it. We did many things, holding him upright sometimes helped, loud music was another, car journeys were quite good too, rocking him in our arms, running the vacuum cleaner or hair dryer, wearing him in a sling, getting outside - all things that would work one day, then wouldn't the next. We would keep a list and then go through each one until we tried them all.
A friend sent me the link to an article in PHD in parenting about purple crying. 'Purple' is an acronym to describe the kind of crying healthy newborns sometimes do. If you have checked your baby is healthy and there are no other causes it could be that your child is suffering purple crying. When I read the article and followed the link to the official website I felt at once that I was reading about my children. At last someone had explained what was going on. My child was normal, the crying wasn't my fault, my child didn't have some dreaded disease and it wasn't harming him at all. How many parents could have avoided the feeling of 'what am I doing wrong, my child hates me' just by reading this.
The awareness campaign is running in the US and trying to raise awareness of the risks parental abuse or of babies being shaken because the crying seems so hard to deal with. If your child has been checked by a doctor and you are told they are fine then maybe it is just purple crying.

A day out

2011-11-09T20:50:00.001Z

So my friend mustered up an apology of sorts - incidentally, why do people say "I'm sorry, but.....", then proceed to tell you again the very thing that upset you in the first place. Pointless!! - and I tentatively accepted so things are shaky but OK I guess. Im not sure what I feel about it now because even though the apology is there, she still put those thoughts out there. Ho hum.

We had an appalling night and I definitely need to sort out a better way of co-sleeping so as to get more sleep. I think DH will be back on the floor and Im looking at ways to get a cot the same height as our mattress. Not sure quite how yet. This morning I thought we were back to the hours of crying but thankfully his initial grizzles didn't persist. We left at 9am and dropped Nathan at college then headed to visit my friend L in Gillingham, stopping off at Lidl for Christmas biscuits. We spent a lovely couple of hours, although her children are rather exuberant and energetic at times.
We got home around lunch time then spent the afternoon doing not much. I caught up with a friend and the girls looked after Lucas, then this evening he was happy to spend time playing again. Its like he is a different boy, I should jab him more often ;)
Seb got his first Reading Eggs certificate and is very happy, I also added Emma to Reading Eggs and Study Ladder, both of which do older kids programmes.This evening I am very tired and feeling a little sick so early(ish) night for me I think.

Why Cant We Be Friends?

2011-11-08T21:50:00.002Z

When we started our Home Ed journey one of the key things we were looking forward to was meeting like-minded people. After our experience in the school playgrounds we were more than happy to leave the bitching, sniping and one-up-manship behind. Im sure it will come as no surprise to hear that the HE community is just as prone to this behaviour.
Today I was talking to a friend, I am using the term loosely post phone call, on the phone about how HE was going. I was talking about how tough things were right now and how I was unhappy with how the kids were behaving . And that they weren't doing much work whilst Lucas is taking so much of my time. I dont know how but suddenly her tone of voice changed and she told me in no uncertain terms that that's how HE should be. Going on to inform me that I am somehow ruining the name of HE by following curriculums and courses, that it makes Autonomous Educators look bad and that I should stop trying to comply with the government and make them like me.

Huh? Where did that come from? Has this lady held these thoughts in her head all this time?
See, what I dont get is when it became an Us and Them situation. How does what I do reflect badly on what she does? The law states that HE must suit the child and as our children are different I dont see how my home education choices are anything to do with hers or why they should be the same.
Honestly, all I care about is making it through the day as sanely as possible with as little carnage as possible. I dont, generally give much thought to what other HE'ers are doing or not doing. I dont spend my time criticising their choices, or questioning the hows and the whys. I'm too busy.

My friend is very autonomous, and that isn't a problem for me at all. I find her family to be well bought up, polite and considerate usually. Her children are lovely and they do keep themselves occupied each day, they aren't idle. I respect her decision and wouldn't question it, its not right for me but that's about me and my family, not about her. And yet here she is, clearly unhappy, judgemental and disapproving of what I do. I don't get it.

I am a member of a small HE group that talks about all things structure. Its lovely. But are we talking about AE and how terrible it is? Are we plotting to unite with the Government to get compulsory visits? Are we gloating that our way is best? NO
What we are doing is asking for ideas and tips, what we are doing is muddling through each day and supporting each other through what is ultimately a difficult job to do. Helping each other to support and facilitate our children's learning so they make it into independent successful adulthood. We dont have time to start plotting world domination because we are far too busy angst-ing over which textbook little Johnny might prefer. *sigh*

And the saddest thing about all this is that we've been close friends for years, even with our difference of opinions on lots of things, and yet this tiny thing has changed all that. And I really dont understand why.

Marked Differences

2011-11-08T21:39:00.001Z

I'm writing it down in case its a one-off but Lucas has been lovely today. He woke at 5.30 and I got up and took him downstairs. Nathan had been up all night (grrrrr!) so was there to talk to him whilst I did some housework then fed him. After his nap we went into town and I helped Seb choose Christmas presents for everyone from Poundland then it was time for the first of the dreaded jabs. I always take the kids later than recommended but Lucas is way older than the others were.
I didn't know how he'd do but apart from a little cry during the process he has been absolutely fine. The rest of the afternoon went just as well, lots of happy smiles, laughter and jolliness in between sleeping and eating then a proper sleep or two. I wish I could have videoed his laughter, its just lovely.
Tonight I'm worn out but its so been worth it. The only negative was a phone call that left me a little shocked but that's another post.
I am a very happy me tonight :)

Changing Seasons

2011-11-08T18:26:00.000Z

What a day!!! It was awful I cant describe it any other way. Lucas barely slept on Sunday night so of course neither did I. He slept on my for a couple hours in the morning then he spent an awful lot of the day crying. I took him in the pushchair for a walk which placated him for an hour. Then we drove to Wincanton to drop Abi off for ANOTHER Math session before her exam next Monday. So he was quiet on the 1/2 hour drive there and 1/2 hour drive back. Then cried pretty much constantly till DH came home.Bleurgh!

BUT What I am really blogging about is how the season seems to have changed. Last week we had beautiful golden and red trees. It was truly stunning and obviously autumnal. Today by contrast, the sky was grey and shadowy, many of the trees were bare and the colours were muted. Such a difference and although Autumn is meant to be all of September, October and November, it really felt like Winter was here!

Busy Weekend

2011-11-06T23:27:00.035Z

Saturday was not such a good day. Lucas waas 'trying' and it really made me wonder why I bother avoiding milk. First thing I took Seb and the girls out to Wincanton for their various tutoring lessons. I had to hang out there whilst Seb had his lesson,then I fed and changed Lucas before heading home. I arrived home to see that Abi had a letter from Kingston Maurwood - so exciting but it meant a long day waiting for Abi to open it.
The girls were going straight from their lessons to L house to have a bonfire night with friends. I tried not to get upset about it but L had said she was keeping things quieter this year but it turned out all the same people were there except DH and I, so what she really meant was she didn't want Seb here. There is a bit of an anti-boy thing going on in our HE community and I find it hard not to be upset, no matter how subtle the people are. *must not dwell, must not dwell*
DH collected the girls around 9 then I finally got to find out what Abi's letter said. It turns out that she has an interview with them at the end of the month, I'm so pleased for her. DH had promised ds a sleepover on Saturday night so after collecting the girls they slept in there on the floor and I got the bed to myself.

Today has been better. When Lucas woke up at 5 I got up, stripped the bed,put on washing/ tumble drying, loaded the dishwasher and hoovered and Lucas was very good.
DH got up at 7 and we spent the day sorting junk, going to the tip, shopping, fixing our bed, changing beds, and tidying. Its been a productive day. Wish DH didn't need to work tomorrow.

The Online Learning Environment

2011-11-04T23:32:00.005Z

Well I wasn't going to, but I ended up signing up to several sites for Seb. Hopefully its all worth it.
Reading Eggs was recommended by a friend and has good reviews. This is going to be a bit of a 'Must Do' on the list.Then there is Study Ladder which we used when it was smart kiddies. Not sure yet how it'll go but Im expecting this to be another 'Must Do' item. Both Jump Start and Math Blaster were discovered using Anne's Knowledge Adventure link. And I also joined True Learning which I saw highly recommended on a friend's website.
So far we have only had a little play on the websites. Reading Eggs is a bit of a hit so far. I started Seb at the very beginning which is way too easy for the most part but its a good refresher as he keeps forgetting the sounds of different letters especially C,G, J, U, W and Y. I was also impressed to discover that there is a reading comprehension scheme for older kids.
Study Ladder is irritating me already, instead of interactive, Seb is having to have me read all his work, definitely not what I was hoping. Again there are activities for older kids.
Jumpstart and Mathblaster are excellent games and if you are a member you can download 4 learning games suitable for children aged 3-10. All very impressive.
The failure for all of them is that Seb needs me there to input his details and access the right bit. There is a lot of click-through to reach his lessons so until he works that out its more taxing than I'd like. I am trying to get into the habit of logging in when I get up each day for now. I'll see how the online thing goes but I must confess I DO prefer pen and paper!

Short Note

2011-11-04T22:33:00.001Z

DH had a busy day today so left the house at 7am to pick up the chipper he'd hired to clear the trees he and J had taken down earlier in the week. They worked all day in the rain and when he got home at 5 he was soaked through and knackered. He'd managed to injure his thumb too. He is always injuring something.
We went to HEY in the morning which was good then spent the afternoon doing the usual (read as: walking with the baby ALL afternoon)
By this evening we were both worn out so we had Chinese for tea and an early night; or not so early in my case but I was desperate for the 'me' time.

Ooooh Cheeky!

2011-11-03T19:26:00.000Z

Well today has been a bit of a day really.
I did manage half an hour of peace in the morning when Lucas finally fell asleep. I am not sure he is too keen on imposed feeding routine (aiming for a minimum of 2 hourly during the day) but I am just not able to keep up the half-hourly feeding regime we were in. Of course for the next day or two I am expecting a little resistance. Actually based on the fact I have rather 'militant and determined' boys I'm expecting A LOT of resistance. DH made my day by texting to tell me rain had stopped work so he was coming home at lunch time.
The health visitor came over for the scheduled 16 week check up they do now-a-days and Lucas happily passed with flying colours. He still has a big head though,lol.

Our title refers to the post we received today.We were a bit shocked when we received a letter from our energy suppliers today saying that based on our usage they were putting up our bill. The reason we were shocked is that for the last 2 years we have received back nearly £200 per year BACK in over-payment because we dont use as much as our direct debits. So DH phoned them and told them actually, no, they weren't going to put up our payments and we are likely to move suppliers if they even tried. Don't think the lady on the phone was too happy but still. Money grabbing so-and-so's!!!
Next was a phone call to the doctor to book Lucas' first round of injections. Only 2 months late but then I never follow the recommended schedule when I take my kids for injections. Instead of 2,3,4 months I tend to go for 3,6,9 months then the other two at 12 and 15 mth ish. I am not really happy with how many injections they need to have OR how many different things they stick in each vaccine. Anyway my HV did look a little shocked when I said he hadn't been immunised yet but I dont really care.
The other other thing we did this afternoon is caved and decided to get Sky back. We have been without for over a year but with me not having a lot of time or energy to expend on the kids I am thinking it would be a good(hmm, is that the right word???) addition to the house. I am quite looking forward to Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, Christmas movies and of course, Nigella's Christmas cooking series. Nothing quite says Christmas like cookery shows, and yes, I know I've seen them all before. :-)

I give myself such very good advice

2011-11-02T23:30:00.000Z

....but I very seldom follow it. (Alice in Wonderland)

Getting out every day is NOT easy when it raining and and overcast. I very nearly didnt but come 11am the non-coping panic began so we bundled into warmish clothes and hit the streets. It was good timing as Lucas was tired so we walked, aimlessly, for an hour. Seb got to see some more signs of fall and I felt I did my bit educationally.
We had a very brief chat about the difference between the sound of 30 and 50 and how to tell by beginning sounds how much three-tens(/thr/ sound) and five-tens(/ff/ sound) are. I also did some letter sound/name recognition with a, c, e, g, w, y, I am still convinced he isn't 'hearing' sounds and definitely needs another Doctors appointment.
This afternoon I was visited by our local infant feeding specialist. (Thank you A, for organising it) The gist of it was that Lucas perfectly healthy, latching well and feeding well but was in a pattern of snacking. Her advice was to go against the grain a little and not feed on demand, instead feed a minimum of two hourly. I feel happier now she has kind of given me permission, as such, to let him cry. What she did say was that he has minor tongue tie(very minor, clearly not a problem - but cue panic and anxiety from me) That should have been the first thing they checked when I was having trouble, but they didn't. That's the NHS for you! It was a positive outcome and I'm glad she came.

Pinch Punch

2011-11-01T21:30:00.000Z

1st of the month. Already. Eek!
Here is our pumpkin carving offerings from yesterday; Abi's, Seb's and Emma's. I do rather like Abi's, but trust her to do an animal one.

Today after considering staying home I forced myself out of the house and we took the bus to town. £8.35(!!!!!) for me and two children to get the bus, I couldn't believe it! But it was worth it because Lucas went into his pushchair and was then mostly happy to stay in there for the rest of the trip. We got home in time to feed him and then in the afternoon we...actually I dont remember but we made it through anyhow.

Slightly better day.

Enough!

2011-10-31T19:53:00.002Z

I wrote a blog post and blogger deleted it - must be a sign. I'm not going to re-write it but the gist of it was that DH and I reached the end of our tether this weekend. After weeks practically begging DH not to leave me and go to work, he finally saw why. And I had to finally admit to dreading waking up each morning. I was a mess, he was a mess. It was not pretty.

So what does one do when one is barely holding on to their sanity.... One writes lists!

Get out the house every day. Rain or shine I need to go out and do something.
Forgive myself for not living up to my parenting ideals - plastic toys and Disney cartoons are not going to kill him (Think: Sanity First)
Seriously consider my feeding options Struggling with this one. Want to b/feed but its pushing my coping buttons especially at night. Am having a visit from the b/feeding specialist tomorrow.
Get online schooling sorted for Seb. I cant tell you on how many levels I'm failing him right now. Whilst people keep telling me its fine, actually its not. He is nearly 7 and cant read or count to 30 properly. The S -word(school) has been mentioned. Seriously, I'm failing!
Say no. Stop doing lots of clubs, groups and things that are stressful, time consuming and difficult.
Use any means necessary to make life easier. Pay the cleaner, pay the kids, buy meals in throwaway packets; anything that helps
Use abnormally large amounts of Rescue Remedy. On the basis that this is probably better all round than a stiff drink or strong drugs.
Daily, list good things that have happened. Starting tomorrow! Not saying nothing good happened today, but it didn't.
Repeat daily: It wont last for ever. Because he wont be like this once he is two, oh no, we'll be into toddler tantrums then.!!!

If my sanity holds out, and there are no guarantees at this point, by Christmas he should be eating food or almost. He should also be sitting and hopefully crawling too. Then this constant crying/screaming etc will seem such a short phase. Hmm....

20 weeks, 20 months, 20 years: Forward Planning

2011-10-30T20:45:00.001Z

Jax over at Making It Up wrote about what she would like her life to be like in 20 weeks, 20 months and 20 years and asked if others fancied having a go. Well I love to imagine these kinds of things, Im a planning addict did you know? So I thought I'd have a go.
In twenty weeks Lucas will be around 8 months old. I cant imagine it really, but then I never really imagined having a fifth child to start with so I have no idea what it will be like. He'll be crawling I imagine, or moving in some way or another. I really really really want to still be breastfeeding at this stage. It means a lot to me for lots of reasons although my sanity is taking a battering over it. We'll see. By then I am hoping to have a firmer grip on both the house work and home education which had disintegrated so very badly since Lucas was born. I'd like Seb to be reading by then, not sure how feasible that is. And DH will have gotten through his first winter of being self employed, maybe with work to see him through but if not he will be getting reading to start looking for more work by then. I don't think much else would have changed.
In twenty months I'd ideally not want to be living here, but again I don't know how realistic that is. Ideally, we'd need to be looking to upgrade to accommodate us all as this house is not quite big enough given the differing ages of the children. Nathan will be finished with college by then, and Abi will be half way through her chosen college course. Id imagine Emma will be starting exams or courses of one kind or another. Id like to think Seb will definitely be reading by then, and hopefully learning lots and enjoying being a boy. I will of course have Lucas as a toddler, and I want to be enjoying lots of days out to interesting groups and places. I am sure if Seb is still into all his boy stuff we can have fun getting into fire making, den building and other such things. Although I'll still have another 14ish (eek!) years home edding left in me, I would like to be thinking about a way of making money/working some how at that point. My interests and ideas have changed greatly over time and I imagine myself working with HE'ers who want to talk about curriculums,or new HE'ers who need support or working with mums who need support with breastfeeding not necessarily professionally but more in a friendly 'been there, done that' kind of way. DH will hopefully have his business thriving by then, earning enough money to see us through as we'll lose tax credits and child benefits from the oldest two by then.
In twenty years... now that's a hard one isn't it. 3 fifths of my children will be independent and living their own lives by then and even the other two will be in university or in their chosen career Id hope. Id like to see them happy and content in whatever they are doing. Id like to finally have my OU degree by then and to be working in a career I like, not just doing it to pay bills. I want to have learnt to knit and crochet, to sew and do quilting. I imagine we'll be looking to downgrade our living accommodation by then and Id like somewhere with an easy-maintain garden with fruit trees and an allotment bed. Jax mentioned solar panels and I'd like that too. DH would hopefully have more time and even be passing his business on to one of the kids if they want that. Maybe we'd have time to travel and just be.

So there you have it. A few things to think about and work on, a lot of dreams and ideas I wonder if I'll look back and have achieved them or whether they'll have changed by then. Time will tell.

Head Down, Marching Onward...

2011-10-27T08:27:00.001+01:00

After my mini mental breakdown on Monday I decided it was time to leave the house so Tuesday I went with DH to take Abi to Bicton. We had a nice drive there, an amble around Exeter then back to collect Abi before heading home. I did have one awkward moment when I had to express a little milk to give Lucas his Colief and had to express into a teacup in Tesco cafe. Honestly, the things I do for this boy!! It was a nice day out and Im glad I got to escape the house for a while considering the rest of the week has been hard.

My parents came to visit Friday til Tuesday and they were a great help if you ignore their less than helpful comments. It was rather fun to prove them wrong though though especially when they say "well have you tried putting him down?" (Errrr, NO, what do you think?) "He wakes up immediately, watch... oh look he's awake". I did this several times and it finally sank in. It was the same with her advice on rattles "Why dont you give him a rattle, he's bored" ......(9 separate attempts later) "oh I guess he really doesnt like to play with rattles", and her recommendation that he should play on the floor "Oh I guess he really does cry after a minute on the floor"*sigh* What? Did she think I made it up to sound worse? Why would I not do something If I could.Yes Mum, I have one of those babies!!
Despite all that, they left on Tuesday and the void was distinctly noticable. I'd like to say I didnt fall apart but sadly I did.
Moving on...
Tuesday we saw THE most spectacular forked lightening (purple and red!!) during an amazing thunderstorm and the heaveist rain we've had in a while. Thankfully dh got to Devon and back without having to struggle with the weather too much. The rest of the week has been wet, horribly wet - Autumn is definitely here. Thankfully I have the likes of Railway Children, Swallows and Amazons, Incrdible Journey and Water Babies on DVD to keep us going and several jigsaw puzzles waiting to be completed.
I managed to go to a support group yesterday, so at least I got out and today we are going to a friends' house- not looking forward to that. Well thats not true, she's lovely, but the whole grumpy baby thing is a bit hard to handle when Im out. On Friday we have Sebs friends coming to visit whihc will be nice.

Things you talk yourself into.....

2011-10-17T20:48:00.000+01:00

Its official I am an anxious mum. Whilst feeling like hell and having to force myself to stay upright so as not to drop the baby I launched myself into a day of tying myself up in knots.

First it was this little coughing thing he does. Could be he has learnt a new trick. Or maybe something is wrong! And what about his drooling and dribbling - is he having some trouble swallowing?
Then there are his poos.Is it me or are they tinged green? And did I see a streak of blood? DH assures me that no I didnt, but maybe his eyesight is playing up?
And this crying, after all, he wouldnt cry all the time if he was fine, would he? And he wont suck, so Im clearly not able to breastfeed properly, so maybe his crying is hunger?
And what about the fact his right eye is a little wonky- is it because I didnt push him out properly? Did I squash him? And now you look at it, his head from the top doesnt look symetrical, does he have brain swelling?
And he's crying like he's in pain. Maybe his umbilical hernia is more serious and he has intestine stuck in it somehow!!!

And thats how I have spent today between the coughing and sneezing. Its crazy and I never really clocked how neurotic I was until now. Even now he has cried himself to sleep and is tucked safely into his moses basket I am floating between terrified that something is wrong and berating my idiocy over it all.
And on top of it, I am cross because yesterday I declared "Sod it! He's the same whether I have milk products or not so I might as well eat that rock cake! Of course today he has been awful and I am suddenly aware of how much better he had been without me realising it. So no more milk (again) then!

Tonight I almost dread having to do it all again tomorrow. I think I need some sleep!

This Week

2011-10-16T17:08:00.000+01:00

So. Its Sunday already. Another week gone, I dont really remember where. Lots of intelligent sounding posts planned in my mind but I cant be bothered to write them now Im finally sitting here in front of the pc.
Instead lets recap.

This week.....

I bought Emma the Apologia Astronomy book and Journal after she had her fiftieth tantrum over World of Space
I cried every morning for four days after waking and realising that I had to do another day
I got Lucas weighed and happily discovered he is following the curve on the graph in his book so must be thriving.
I located a wooden castle that I like (at last) and bought it from Play Merrily. It works well with his Schleich knights
I bought ACE Biology fo Abi and Math/English/Science for Emma
I spent money at Amazon on traditional films (swiss family robinson/railway children etc) for the winter
DH worked 5 long days -7am til 7pm - on a huge driveway job
Seb has been making the lego toys from The Sun
Abi got the date for her next exam which we paid for
The girls went to a birthday sleepover
Seb willingly did his map work each day
We went to HEY and a friend took Seb and Emma to the park afterwards
The handbrake on my car got fixed
Lucas and I discovered the wonders of Colief
DH rotavated the garden, tidied it and laid slabs.
I made spicy pumpkin soup
Nathan had friends staying every night this week
I have had an emotional week regarding Seb and his behaviour.
Our laptop and PC went back to be fixed. Again!!
I bought Lucas some new clothes after he decided to grow!
Lucas is now in size 3 nappies!!
I have a cold and feel ill :( (nursing whilst Im ill is NOT fun)

Snapshot for another day.

2011-10-10T22:35:00.000+01:00

Blogging is a funny thing isnt it? Some people dont want to write so publicly, some people like to keep a specific diary, some people only blog the good stuff. I tend to blog everything. I try quite hard to only write good stuff but I fail miserably with that. I try to keep it all about home ed but that fails too. I try to write with perspective but tend to blurt it all out.
The thing about me is I like to write about life exactly as it feels to me at that moment in time. It doesnt mean its necessary the truth but it is my truth, about how I see life from my perspective. What it means is that when I look back in 5, 10 or more years I'll not be seeing what was happening in my life so much as viewing a snapshot of who I am and how I see things at this point in my life.
So I may shock, I may offend, and I may whinge. I may say things that seem stupid or cruel or just plain ridiculous but this blog is more than just a diary of my life, its my personality and my feelings, captured as a snapshot for another day.

Another week escapes me....

2011-10-08T20:48:00.004+01:00

The funny thing about life here at the minute is that on one hand the days seem so long but on the other, time is flying by: Lucas is 11wks old and there are 77 days until Christmas.
Lucas has been having some better days but who knows why. Could it be that I'm not having milk in my diet? Or could it be that he is just getting bigger, his gut is maturing and he is coping better? I cant exactly say. I did try three days with milk in my diet last week ( I was missing chocolate and cheese. Not together, of course!) and by day three he had been crying almost all day, he'd not slept more than a few minutes at a time and was acting colicky. So the milk stopped again and three days later is a much happier little boy. Not saying he is completely cured. He does this angry little scream/cry which is at just the right pitch to tell you he is NOT impressed with how you are handling him either by trying to feed him/get him to sleep/how you hold him etc. Its a little funny when you think about it, just not so much so at the time. I am very proud of the fact that Im still breastfeeding. Thanks to amazing support from one particular person and lots of positive comments from others I have been able to overcome all the difficulties that had stopped me before and finally its starting to feel like second nature. It makes me sad that I didn't manage it with the others but at least I made it this time.

My plan to have more frugal parenthood with Lucas hasn't worked out too well though. What with sleepsuits, bedding, a carrycot we bought then hated so we sold it, pacifiers, steriliser, bouncy chair which we never use (and must get around to selling), its cost us a small fortune. Its silly, but when you have a baby who is unsettled you try ANYTHING to calm them down. Most recent of purchases are a baby sleep bag which he tried out for the first time last night, and a new sling; the Baba Sling which may be far more convenient to use than my Moby. Or I may hate it. I got it half price so its not a terrible waste if he hates it and I could sell it for a good price if I need to. Either way this is where he likes to be best:

I am standing my ground when it comes to buying toys for Lucas though. I have to keep explaining to dh (and everyone else) why I want Lucas to have wooden rattles and only nice natural toys. It's really a case of starting as I mean to go on because with Seb I always regretted getting roped into allowing things I didnt want him to have and far more than he ever really needed. This time I want toys that are nice and natural and not too many!

Speaking of not too many, Christmas will I think be a frugal affair this year. Each of the kids has asked for only a few things each and the cost of these items is around £100 or less. Still sounds like a lot but in years gone by they would write a list which totalled into the hundreds then Id have to whittle it down, tis far easier to whittle down £100! Not sure whether my parents are coming up this year. I would like them to but on the other hand I am not sure she or I could cope with her meddling. I have already had to suffer stupid comments like "Well if he is so unsettled, why dont you stick him on the bottle", "All the others did ok with bottles" "You're not going to breast feed him that long, are you?" "Other parents manage to put their babies down" "Other babies sleep in their cots" "Why dont you use disposables innstead of washing all the time" and to counter that "Why not use terry squares, I managed with them" *SIGH* Expletives come to mind but I am refraining.
Am I really ready for her to interfere with or criticise everything about how I am dealing with Lucas? I dont think I am strong enough and frankly feel like a stuck record when I repeat ad infinitum about choice, times changing, new research and different parenting choices. She doesnt seem to hear me at all.

Seb finally finished and assembled his lifecycles lapbook at long last. It's taken him far longer than Id hoped but it was nice to have it completed.

Next on the agenda is our Maps mini unit followed by our Building unit. Emma has requested to join in and do them too. This has a double benefit in that she can enjoy learning new things, and that I can rope her into reading to Seb so there is more chance of it actually getting done. Not sure if we'll lapbook or do a main lesson book yet, it'll depend on what the kids prefer though Im edging towards main lesson books.

We managed two nice days out at the beginning of the week. On Monday the kids and I visited my friend H who lives on a farm about a half hour from us . We all had a little campfire to cook sausages, paddled in a stream and wandered around the gardens. It was lovely and warm and we had a great time. On Tuesday we took Abi to Bicton, nipped to Exeter then picked Abi up early and we went to Bicton Gardens in the afternoon. It was cooler but Im glad as Lucas would have been far too hot in the sling otherwise. It has taken me the rest of the week to recover from it all.

On Friday at HEY Seb and Emma did a science workshop on 'matter' with the rest of the group which they seemed to enjoy. The lady who runs the workshops used to be part of HEY and this is her new venture. H cooked jacket potatos for the group so I didnt have to make lunch. I spent the afternoon walking with Lucas to keep him asleep, cooked tea then Em went off to scouts.

On Saturday Graham took the girls out to their French/Music/Maths lessons whilst Seb, Lucas and I attempted to go to town, gave up and came home. If you want to ask why, just ask Lucas. At 12ish we headed to Wincanton to collect the girls and Seb had his first piano lesson which he tried really hard with. S was very pleased with him. When we reached home, Seb wanted to drive around the new housing development which sounds like a fairly harmless activity if I hadnt had to do maneouvers in my new car. I had to turn around so I reversed back, unfortunately I had to reverse slightly down a steep hill and put the handbrake on to go into forward gear only to discover that our handbrake didnt work. So it required very quick thinking and lots of clutch control to get us going again. Eeek!
By the time we got home I was worn out so we hung out till dh got home, ordered chinese for tea then Lucas and I went to bed because he is unsettled again, whilst dh stayed up painting the kitchen. Hope I like the colour.

Tired Ramble...

2011-10-02T21:12:00.002+01:00

On the advice of some very sensible people I decided to forego the beach yesterday and stay home. Probably just as well seeing as the girls announced that they were due to attend a party this afternoon.
Ooops, forgot that!!!
They went off to French/Music/Maths lessons so it was just Seb and I. Seb played animal crossing for hours this morning, much to my dismay. Its so nice I want him to be outside but no such luck. I couldnt do much even with Lucas in the sling but I answered emails that are well overdue. I attempted the park and town later on in the day but Lucas insisted on exercising his vocal chords the whole time so they turned into two very condensed and miserable trips. We'll gloss over the rest of yesterday because I suspect no one comes here to hear me whinge.(Or maybe they do! But thats another blog post )

Lucas and I didnt sleep all that well last night which I am sure is down to the heat here - Glorious, but not much fun to sleep in! Today he woke, ate, then dh and I laid in bed with him; all snuggled up, laughing and cooing together. It was the first time in a while I felt connected to dh so was nice. Lucas happily slept for 3 hours in his sling whilst we cooked and ate breakfast(fry up, yum!) and I sewed badges onto Emma's scouts shirt and Sebs Beavers sweatshirt.
Meanwhile Seb and dh went to the garage to empty dh van, then to the bit of land he aquired (which was just offered to him by one of his clients in return for maintaining it)to offload logs and grass cuttings.I fed Lucas then Abi wore him in the sling whilst I ironed (yes! you did hear right) our new duvet and remembered why I rarely buy 100% cotton these days.
DH and seb dismantled and reassembled our bike sheds then we headed to Tesco.This afternoon Lucas has been very unsettled and we are debating whether it's the heat, the fact Im having dairy in my diet again, a random tummy bug, OR something else. With this boy you never know! Finally got him in bed asleep now but how long for is anyones guess. *sigh*

At least the sun shone.

2011-09-29T22:08:00.002+01:00

Its been a really lovely day here today. So warm and balmy you'd be forgiven for thinking we were in the height of summer, or in an entirely different country. Lovely!I have a better grip on myself now and am feeling better and more in control than I was, which is always a good thing.(Phew, I hear you say!)Lucas hasn't slept much, or well today and feeding was slow today as he wasnt really interested. Not sure how to get him feeding more because he screams when you try to feed him and he doesnt want to. Though to be honest, he screams anyway. The girls worked well and everyone has gotten into Animal Crossing again so thats an all day occurrance (by the time all three have done everything they 'need' to).They have been in the garden a fair amount too and have been spotting lots of bugs. Seb is especially keen on playing in the sand pit again and everyone loves the trampoline.Dh and his new employee have been working flat out from 7.30 til 5 most days just to keep up with work and they have several big jobs over the coming weeks. He is spending the evenings visiting people to give quotes, then coming home and typing them all up. Yesterday our main pc was carted back to Currys for fixing as I was finally sick of all the blue screen errors on it. It'll be about 2 weeks before we get to see it again though so I spent tonight trying to rig the printer to my laptop so we can print. What a hassle, though I got there in the end.Today we ditched schoolwork and went to Sherborne Old Castle to meet up with friends in the morning. I bought lunch in Morrisons then went to Wincanton to see more friends in the afternoon. When your baby screams as much as Lucas does it is better for them to do it outdoors where it sounds less intense. ;)Tomorrow we are off to Glastonbury museum to learn about the Victorians - Our HE group is a bit depleted at the moment though so I hope enough people show up to run it. Looks like another gorgeous day tomorrow too so we may hang out a bit afterwards. I am considering heading to the beach at the weekend but cant decide whether it will be too crowded as, no doubt, everyone will have the same idea. Frankly its a good hours' drive to get there (our nearest are Poole or Weymouth) and I dont fancy being surrounded.On the other hand I do adore going to the beach. Oh, what to do....

Holding a bit of a pity party here.

2011-09-25T17:59:00.002+01:00

Things here have been quiet really and mainly unchanged. Emma still seems a little fragile but I am beginning to suspect pre-teen hormones are playing a huge part in this. I remember it with Abi and all you can do is let things happen. She is throwing herself into her new schedule though, and seems to love it. She learnt a huge lesson after last week where she left her harder stuff till later in the week then struggled with the amount of work she'd left herself. This week she has scheduled most of her harder/long winded stuff during the early part of the week so the end of the week will be easy. The only flaw with it all is her great science adventures-space which isn't so great. It is a real hassle. Before she could start the course she had to spend nearly 4 hours making the mini books, cutting out the graphics and learning the folds. Every lesson involves heaps of faffing,folding, chopping and changing. Emma hates it and wishes she'd picked Apologia Elementary Astronomy instead. Still, we'll muddle through for now and hopefully it will get better or she'll work though it quickly and we'll get on to something else.
Lucas continues to baffle me and I have never felt so out of my depth. He will respond to something positively one day, the negatively the next. He'll feed well one second,then act like he doesn't know how to latch on the next. He'll eat hourly, then wont eat for ages. Grrrrrr! Its just so hard and I truly have no idea what is going on. I felt so much more confident with the others but with Lucas I'm a bag of nerves. Then there is this reflux thing, which I am not really convinced he has (namely the lack of regurgitated milk for starters). One minute I give him gaviscon and he seems a better child, another moment its made no difference. If I forget to give it to him he can seem fine and like he doesn't need medicine, or he can seem gassy and uncomfortable. It makes no sense. But I cant shake the anxiety or the feeling of complete and utter failure. *sigh* I confess to being more than a little envious of those who have babies and still find a way to get housework done and home-school their kids. I can't even manage to brush my teeth some mornings and I rarely leave the house any more. Seb being six doesn't understand why I am so useless and is just angry, resentful and hut most of the time. I have been told it gets better but I am not sure if there is an expiration date on that, shouldn't it be 3 weeks, or 6 weeks? Well I've passed those landmarks and still cant get my act together.
Seb seems to be struggling with things too. Namely the fact that I have become the 'in a minute' mummy. :( He wants to do things and I am so tied up with the baby that I have to say 'hang on', 'wait', or 'no'. Of course him choosing to ask to do things whilst I am feeding and tied to one spot doesn't help matters. And it is equally difficult when I am having to jiggle Lucas because I don't have a hand free then either. He finished his activity book on Friday which was a great relief to us all and he is now the proud owner of lots of lovely new school books. He really liked the Start-Up science (Singapore science for grade 1-2 but definitely suitable for Kindergarten or younger IMO) and Singapore Maths is a big hit too. I am trying not to be neurotic about his reading but I confess I am worried. He impressed us all by finding a huge, fluffy caterpillar in the garden which Abi identified as a pale tussock - i'll take her word for it as I wouldn't have a clue. It is now holed up in a Tupperware with lots of leaves and some water whilst we wait for it to change. Not much else to add but its meant to be nicer weather this week so maybe there'll be more nice things to tell.

Changing Tact.

2011-09-24T10:59:00.001+01:00

A couple of weeks ago, out of nowhere Emma announced that she wanted to go to school. It was a shock to me as I had spent 7 weeks in a lucas-bubble and felt Id clearly missed something along the way. I wasnt convinced but she was adament so I agreed to phone the school, which I did, then tried to get to the bottom of it. It was a while before she would talk to me (her selective mutism kicked in*sigh*) but when she did, it emerged that she felt I never had any time to help her with her work or to listen to her. Huge mummy fail :(
So once I had appologised for the umpteenth time I asked what would make her happy and it turned out she wanted more science and more time with people *Great! the two things I hate/dont do well!*
SO with that in mind I let her loose on Ichthus Resources to see what she fancied doing for science and it turned out she picked Zoology 1, Great Science Adventures - Space and Homeschool Science Adventures - light.Not my choice but, lets face it, I cant stand science.
After finishing her ACE social studies in the summer I decided to give her the option of what/how to study within this area and she ended up choosing geography and maps. So I bought A Childs introduction to the World, Geography from A to Z, and A Childs Geography of the World. Emma is going to produce a main lesson book of what she learns and I am going to try not to be neurotic about what should (or shouldn't) be in it!
To help her feel more in control I changed how we timetable her so now she has little cards with all her subjects on and each day she works through them with the aim of ticking them all off her chart by the end of the week. She can choose the order she works and how much she does as long as she is done by the end of Sunday. She says its less boring now.

Friends are much harder to produce out of thin air. But a summer not seeing anyone or doing anything has made Emma thoroughly miserable. With that in mind I need to try and ensure she keeps up her friendships so I contacted friends of hers to arrange days to meet up. We managed one day but the friends mum cancelled all the other days. Emma wasnt happy but that is really out of my control and there was nothing I could do. She still seemed to take it out on me though. I have tried to encourage her to make friends within the groups she attends but she just doesnt seem to be able to manage it. Even at scouts she still doesnt talk much to the others even though she is far better than she was. I dont know how to help her with this one. Even if she went to school, friendships would still rely a huge amount part on her speaking!!! At least we are back in the swing of clubs and groups now which will hopefully help her a little.
By the end of the day she'd deccided not to go to school after all. Just as well the school never bothered to call us back then *rolls eyes* I just hope she is happier with and sticks to her decision now.

Why health in pregnancy is so important.

2011-09-20T22:02:00.002+01:00

Merry over at Patch of Puddles asked for bloggers to write a post about achieving a healthy pregnancy to help her launch a campaign along with Tommy's Baby Campaign and Bounty UK to promote their new 5 Point Plan for healthy pregnancy . I was happy to oblige and support this cause as I finally realise how important it is to take care of your health during pregnancy.

When I was first pregnant 16 years ago I took folic acid as soon as I discovered I was pregnant until 12 weeks but that was the extent of the care I took of myself. I was lucky that my 4 week early baby was born reasonably healthy, excluding a six day stint in special care with phototherapy lights because of jaundice. I was also lucky a second and a third time dispite being over weight and suffering from high blood pressure, protien in my urine, severe odema and having to be induced. My forth pregnancy however was not so straight forward.
I took my folic acid but otherwise went through the pregnancy without giving it another thought. I suffered from relatively frequent colds throughout the pregnancy, was overweight and had raised blood pressure from fairly early on. At 26 weeks, following a horrid cold that put me in hospital with a chest infection I began to suffer severe itching of the kind I have never experienced before and was diagnosed with having Obstetric Cholestasis.
This information is taken from the OC Support UK website. "Obstetric Cholestasis (OC) is a liver disorder which occurs during pregnancy, andwhich has been known to be diagnosed at any time from 8 weeks onwards.Itis also referred to as intrahepatic cholestasis of pregnancy (ICP). Itaffects 1 in 140 pregnant women each year in the UK, but may beslightly more common in women of Asian origin. The causes of OC are notyet understood.....OC has been reported to be associated with an increased risk of spontaneous premature birth, fetal distress and stillbirth....Reportedrecurrence rates vary, with some researchers stating 60% and others upto 90%. What is known is that women who have OC in one pregnancy arevery likely to develop it again in a subsequent one."
Upon hearing this diagnosis I was terrified for myself and for my baby. I spent the next 11 weeks on high alert, with weekly scans, blood tests, check ups and appointments. My baby was born at 37 weeks after being induced early to prevent stillbirth. The labour was difficult and the whole induction process took 5 days.

As much as I wanted more children I vowed never to do it again. Ever. So imagine my shock when I discovered I was pregnant in Novermber last year. I confess I was devastated at first and cried for a long time and even hid it from my husband for nearly a month until I could talk about it. In the year prior to my pregnancy I had lost over a stone in weight and whilst overweight I was healthier to begin with than at the start of any other pregnancy. I was so terrified of developing OC again that I spent a lot of time researching ways to help prevent it, although there is no guaranteed way to ensure it didnt reoccur. As well as taking folic acid for the the first 20 weeks, I immediately began taking Osteocare which helped keep me topped up with calcium and I took a sachet of Spatone daily and increased it to 2 sachets in the last 12 weeks, as I had suffered quite severely with low iron during all my other pregnancies. I backed this up with sambucol to aid the digestion of iron.
As well as the government reccomendations to help prevent OC reoccuring which included eating a low fat diet and keeping a good weight, I also took daily suppliments of lemon juice and apple cider vinegar (both help with processing liver fats, and cleaning the liver). I avoided caffiene and ate small regular meals. I kept active for as long as possible to ensure I didnt put on too much weight.
Health wise this was my best pregnancy. I never had a single high blood pressure result, no proteins or glucose in my urine, no problems at all and only mild swelling in the last two weeks of pregnancy. Even better, not a single sign of OC at all.
My head however was not in a good place. After my initial reluctance to go through with the pregnancy, the terror set in. I had six friends who had experienced baby loss through miscarriage, stillbirth and neo-natal death within the year prior and had a new found realisation that not all babies make it home. This scared me and I suffered quite severe nightmares and panic attacks for the first 20 weeks of my pregnancy. The best way I found to take care of my mental health was to stop myself reading about anything baby related. I took myself off facebook, unsubscribed from blogs and refused to read or watch any baby-related literature and media coverage at all. Instead I focused on lots of relaxation tachniques, listened to classical music and only allowed myself to have happy thoughts. I also kept a private blog throughout the pregnancy where I wrote down every fear. When my baby was born after a health 1hr active labour I felt almost numb and shocked for a while and realised I hadnt really accepted I would be bringing a baby home at all. It took a good sob of relief to help me deal with it all.
I do think that many women take pregnancy for granted and dont realise the importance of diet, exercise, good mental health in the welfare of their unborn child. I hope that this blog post along with others can help carry the message that you have to take care of yourself.
How You Can Help.
Join Merry and many others in a blog hop that can be found at Merrys blog, Patch of Puddles. You will find a linky at the bottom of the original post. Just write your blog post add your blog to the linky. There is an incentive for joining the blog hop too.

Aaah, Peace!

2011-09-17T22:20:00.001+01:00

Lucas is finally asleep and I am finally in bed. I love my bed, did you know that? I never used to but now I love nothing more than being curled up in bed. Of course, now Im old enough to enjoy my bed; more specifically sleep, my little man has other ideas.
Colic/reflux is still abounding at times and seemingly ebbing at others. There is no rhyme or reason, no pattern or logic. He can have a bad day and a good night or vice versa. Sometimes he cries and picky eats,is full of gas and screams loads. On other days he is smily and placid, feeds well and seems good. Mostly he is a bit of both.

Tonight I am in bed alone as dh and Seb are having a 'camp-in'. It all started when we started clearing the garden whilst turning it from an allotment back into a garden. There was so much green waste and rubbish that we made a heap for a bonfire. This of course meant roasted marshmallows, which led to Seb wanting to camp. Tricky without a tent so we offered him the alternative of bonfire/barbecue along with getting to sleep downstairs under a makeshift tent (duvet draped between two chairs). He thought that would be great so that's what happened, minus the barbecue as the weather is too fickle to be sure we weren't rained on. Seb had a great time outside in the dark whilst handing DH bits to keep stocking the fire. Then it was in for showers and hot choc and they are now in their sleeping bags watching a dvd. I am rather pleased that DH is doing this with Seb, he needs it.

In other news Seb has lost a tooth so now has the cliche gap in the front of his mouth. Emma is away at scouts this weekend. And today we went over £200 on food. We were stocking up though! It also appears that Christmas is on the way and my mind and my bank balance are stewing about how much we should spend this year. Not much is the honest, poor persons answer. But how we'll balance it out remains to be seen.

And just to finish; Lucas having a mammoth nap after a mammoth feed-a-thon.

Too tired for words.

2011-09-15T21:11:00.003+01:00

Sadly I am learning that I just cant be everywhere (dammit, and I thought I was superwoman ) So it seems most sensible for me to choose a place to update and try and do it when I can.
Today was hard. Lucas cried an awful lot. His lymph glands are up and he has a rash and the HV says he has a virus. Not uncommon for babies but hard to know what to do or how to comfort him, he just cried and cried and cried.
Too tired for many words tonight but I will go picture heavy instead.

Emma made this

Abi made this.

Autumn Table

A walk in the woods

To spot mushrooms

Seb made a plane

And painted it.

He built a house for his compare bears.

And found a caterpillar

There has been schoolwork (sort of), visits with friends, Wii-ing, dvds, playing in the garden and cooking too. Emma has really grown to love cooking and it seems we may have found her calling at last. Time will tell.
And finally some photos of the one who is keeping me so occupied.

The one where he ISNT crying.

The one where we capture him smiling (see, he does sometimes!)

The Nights Roll In

2011-09-05T19:02:00.003+01:00

So quickly the days have turned chilly, the nights duller and I am waking up to darkness. OK, so admittedly I am getting up with Lucas at 5.00am but still! Only a couple weeks ago it was light(ish) at that time of day. Now suddenly the nights feel so very, very long.
Lots had been going on with us including a trip to a&e with Lucas and a new diagnosis of reflux, with a recommendation to quit milk and wheat. This is somewhat difficult for me as all the non-milk products contain sunflower oils/veg oils and soya which are all items I have found cause me immense IBS problems. I spend yesterday evening unable to leave the toilet for nearly an hour all because I'd eaten products containing these items in the last three days. I am not sure how to get round it and still eat.
DH has finally had to employ someone to work for him as work has gotten just too crazy. Its weird because J is his casual but he'd taken a job last month so couldn't work for us any more. So last night DH was phoning around to ask if anyone needed work and found no one. He was really desperate and stressed last night and then today out of the blue and phoned to say his job had fallen through and did we have any work. Co-incidences or prayers answered? You decide!
We also rehomed our chickens over the weekend and our garden is officially no longer an allotment area. We are going to turn it into a play area for Seb. We have a trampoline and climbing frame and we are going to purchase a basket ball net and goal for him so he has somewhere he can play without me having to worry. DH has to bark the areas under the climbing frame and trampoline, grass the footie area, and slab the basketball area but it wont take long. He has to plaster and paint the walls too when its dry enough.
Not sure how or when we will get it done with dh so busy, but we have until spring so no major rush.

Positive Negatives

2011-09-01T20:54:00.002+01:00

Its hard to write here at the minute without sounding like I am having a really hard time and verging on pnd. But its not like that at all. The early days with newborns is hard. It just is! We are both getting used to each other, working out what the other wants and needs and how to function together. Tiredness takes some getting used to again as does feeding, which I never managed to do this long before and I didnt have half the hurdles that I have had this time. And having never recorded it before, I want to record those moments and write exactly how I am feeling in that moment in time.
But that isnt the whole picture, and this is the misconception people have when they read blogs. If I am having a whinge or a rant, it does not mean my life is terrible, or that Im depressed, or that I dont appreciate Lucas and love him so much. It just means I have captured a snapshot of emotions and feelings that are hitting me as my fingers hit the keys. Please know that I am fine. :)

Lucas is still not sleeping that well. He doesnt self-sooth either and doesnt seem to like comfort all that much. Basically when he is tired he screams until he sleeps. This is a fact. Also a fact is that I hate crying babies and I am one of those people who mutters under their breath when they see a baby in its pram crying and think "pick that damn baby up and comfort him" But maybe they have a baby like Lucas who wont be comforted. This little boy was obviously sent to me to correct my assumptions and make me think about things like this.

Feeding is better, but I still have one breast that he has to literally force to provide food, and one that he only has to look at for there to be a flood. I feel so uneven that I may keel over from the weight. I wonder if it ever evens out? Still have thrush, grrrrr, but its better than it was.

Pluses include his beautiful smile which, unfortunately, I havent been able to capture on camera yet. And his cute hamster-like pose when he is feeding and puts one fist on each side of my breast as if he is holding and nibbling at food. So cute. I love that stretch he does when you lift him up and he looks like a little old man with a wrinkly brow. And he smells so lovely too.

Life is good.

Proud Me :)

2011-08-25T20:46:00.000+01:00

Well today was exam day and I am incredibly proud of my two biggest children.
Abi got a C in English and a C in her first Maths module. For Abi to achieve this from home whilst struggling with dyslexia and other difficulties is just amazing.
Nathan did fab and got A in English, B in Maths and English Lit, two Cs for science, D in Art and Geography, and F in Graphics(which he hated the whole time). I cant tell you what it means to me to be here in this moment with him having achieved this. Or how much hard work he, we and the school it have put in for him to be here today.
What I DO know is that whatever your childs' difficulty, or however bleak or impossible it seems, children with difficulties and challenges CAN achieve great and miraculous things.

So proud of my children!

Summer

2011-08-24T17:33:00.001+01:00

Summer for Seb has meant:

Hanging with his Brother

Den Building

Fire Lighting

Bug Hunting

As well as stone-carving, wood-carving, swimming, a few days at daycare, visits with friends and a summer activity workbook.
Meanwhile Emma has been busy:

Den building

Firelighting

Woodcarving

as well as Scout Camp, Compass Navigation and stone carving. Not to mention sleepovers, swimming, reading and working through her activity book, some French and Music.

Abi bless her has been working so so very hard. Her summer has literally involved working on her Zoology and Botany, ACE science, Math, French and Music. She took a week off to go to Soul Survivor and is having a week off to go and visit a friend but she is really working so incredibly hard. I cant fault her commitment to what she wants. Shes an amazing girl.

And that, as they say, was Summer.

Remembering Normal

2011-08-23T20:52:00.000+01:00

I felt normal(ish) for the first time today.
Lucas cried for nearly 2 hours last night before crashing eventually and then sleeping til around 1.30am, snacking on and off most of the night and then sleeping form 6am -7.30am. This was like a lie-in for me!
After a massive feed he then managed to sleep in the sling from 8.30 -10.30 and I was able to do loads of housework, help Seb do his schoolwork and read emails. Oh how long its been since I could do that!
He fed and was awake for a while then slept again 1-3 in his carry cot so I decided to take a nap though it was hard waking up again when he woke for more food. After he'd fed for a while it was back in the sling for an enforced sleep whilst I actually cooked tea. Ok, so it was only one of the ready made meals that we prepared before Lucas was born, but I did prepare french beans and got the veg into pans and cooked it all.
Finally we are on our way to a new sense of normal.

So I threw a tantrum...

2011-08-20T09:51:00.000+01:00

I do that sometimes when it all gets a bit much.
Mainly it was about friends, or lack thereof. I have had exactly 3 visitors since Lucas was born. Of the 18 friends who "cant wait to see him" only 3 people have bothered. T came for 15 minutes, R did visit for a couple hours and S came for a few hours too but she has been fab at having Seb and doing running around for us so is excused. And obviously those who don't live near me are excused too. I don't know peoples' reasons or circumstances; maybe they are busy or giving me space, but to be honest Im a bit disappointed in them and a bit miserable too - all these people and no-one to turn to. *sigh* Such is life!
I am also ~~very~~ a little stressed about how we are going to homeschool in September. Yes I know I just had a baby, that doesnt make me feel much better. A certain 6yr old will not do any of the work I had set for him for Summer. We are behind by a topic now so all the other things we were going to do will be behind too. Seb is desperate to go places and do stuff, yet I cant even stop feeding and get off the sofa! By the time Lucas graduates from constant feeding, he'll be headed towards the crawling stage and then I'll still get nothing done. *huff, puff, strop!*
On top of which, all the progress I'd made with Sebs behaviour has been reversed and we are back to having challenging behaviour to deal with again. Yes its my fault. Im a complete flake and cant do discipline because he waits for the feeding to start before beginning a barage of wants and demands. Or just he does what he wants for himself then leaving a trail of mess and distruction behind him. I am not tolerant of finding dismantled toys, spilt paint, food from attempted cooking and other random messes all over the place. DH is so busy (he is getting 3-7 new jobs a day at the mo) he isnt able to help. *grrrr*

So as I said, I threw a tantrum.

Hospitals and Drs

2011-08-15T09:37:00.001+01:00

Im snatching a few minutes to post this whilst Lucas is dozing in his pram.
We have had another rocky week. Lucas, bless him, has been keeping us busy including a brief interlude to a&e when he wouldnt stop crying for over six hours. The best the hospital could do is say it was down to constipation which is ridiculous as breastfed babies dont get constipation! He has been given lactulose medicine as the dr seems to think he has a sluggish digestive system and this is what is causing the pain. Again, not convinced. We did cave and bought dentanox colic drops to try and also dummies too which are big no-nos in the world of breastfeeding but my sanity dictates otherwise.
Also this week I have enjoyed a lovely bout of mastitis which has been incredibly yuck. I had a temperature and swollen breasts, bleurgh. DH, of course, couldnt take any time off work to help so I muddled through, went to the Dr for antibiotics, and am on the other side of it now I hope.
And today it was back to the Dr as Lucas has thrush; it's one thing after another around here.
Abi is away this week at Soul Survivor so Emma is enjoying the peace and quiet in the house and making the most of her bedroom being Abi-free. Nathan has been quite helpful and had Seb for me a couple times. Today he is working with DH so that will be interesting. and Seb has been struggling with having to come second to Lucas' needs.
And baby has started stirring so thats my cue to sign off.

Things I learnt this week.

2011-08-09T18:51:00.000+01:00

Things I learnt about Lucas:
He doesn't like to sleep laying down,
He doesn't like to sleep at night.
He is hungry roughly every 1.5 hours and feeds for 40 minutes.
He suffers from wind and needs to be winded during and after every feed.
He hates being put down.

Things I learnt about me:
I cant sleep sitting up - I get a numb ar*e
I tend to cry when I have been feeding, winding and feeding over and over for most of the night.
I tend to cry when every feed merges into the next.
I tend to cry when he finally drops off and I think he is asleep only for him to scream 10 mins later, me to wind him and him to wake to be fed. Again!
I tend to cry when I have been holding him (and feeding) all day without a break.

Good job I love him.

Perpetual Motion.

2011-08-07T21:05:00.000+01:00

How do people with babies leave the house? I know I did it. Four times I managed to get back up and get on with life but it seems harder somehow this time. Maybe its because I am so intent on breastfeeding and have become involved in everything that entails? Breastfeeding on demand means I feed all the time as Lucas wants to eat roughly every 1.5-2hours day and night. I have learnt things about letdown reflexes, biological nurturing and b/f baby poo that I never even heard about before. Its all quite amazing.
But it still doesnt help me get moving any earlier or easier. I still struggle with leaving the bed or sofa so that I can do other things. Even being on the blog is a delicate balance as I have the baby in his pram and I am having to rock him to make him think he is in the car so that he will stay asleep. Checking my mail feels like a luxury that I can only recieve if I have fed well enough to trick Lucas into sleeping. Its all quite surreal.
It wont be long before I am forgetting this bit and moving on but right now, for this moment, I am stuck in perpetual motion: feed, wind, feed,doze, poop, feed, wind, feed, doze, poop....... and so it goes on.

Letting Go, Moving On....

2011-08-06T22:01:00.002+01:00

Today was always going to be difficult for so many reasons but I made it through and I know it was no accident it worked out this way. I had to let it all go and Lucas came along at just the right time to help that happen. It isnt easy and its a daily process but with him to concentrate on it's made it easier some how. Isnt it funny how it all works out. Call it luck, or destiny, or Divine Intervention but I know it was no accident.

Found this image on the artists gallery page

Life as we know it.

2011-08-05T13:46:00.000+01:00

Everything around here is completely Lucas-cantred at the minute and there isnt much to say. Lucas is doing really well, putting on weight and starting to form a fairly loose routine. Unfortunately that routine includes being awake or unsettled between 1am and 5am each day so Im really very tired - ah you've got to love babies.I was a bit gutted to be putting away most of his newborn stuff already on Thursday. Its because he is so long but its sad to know that he'll be the last child to wear these clothes and I dont want my last child to grow quickly.

Dh still working as hard as ever (surprise surprise!) so I have been trying to get back to normal as much as possible which isnt easy when you can barely manage to leave the sofa all day due to feeding. DH is happy though as work is just pouring in from everywhere and he has had so many people passing his name on to people they know that he is getting 2-6 jobs a day. I am very proud of him.
Nathan is spending his summer out with friends mostly and I havent seen him much at all. Abi is continuing to work really hard on her science portfolio and has made good progress with her next Maths module too (and I am so glad I dont need to teach it!!) She is off for a week to Soul Suvivor the week after next. Emma is procrastinating about her schoolwork and I know she will end up finishing the summer frustrated that she didn't do her work so cant move on but you cant make her see that now so I CBA to try, frankly. Seb has spent a couple days a week at his old daycare which he has enjoyed. They take kids up to age 8 in the holidays so he has seen some old pals and just enjoyed playing. He is the one most obviously affected by Lucas' arrival (apart from me and my lack of sleep) and he's very frustrated and aggressive at the minute so we are watching him carefully.

The new family dynamics are interesting and everyone is trying to work out how we all fit together. My original plans for the summer have been completely scraped now and I can see there is no use at all in trying to enforce them. Its fine but there are lots of conflicting wants and needs right now and its tricky trying to workout how to balance it all. Still, It'll all come together in the end.

Milking It.

2011-08-01T12:06:00.000+01:00

I cant believe Lucas is 10 days old today, time has flown by so fast. Lucas is doing so well and has gained back his birth weight plus half a pound which is fabulous for a breastfed baby. Id like to say the last ten days have gone swimmingly but that isn't entirely true. Baby blues really hit hard just as Lucas and I were trying to get to grips with feeding and I had a few difficult days. I literally felt like I couldn't leave the sofa or bed and had my boobs out all day just feeding, feeding, feeding; it was tough. All my friends who breastfeed raved about how great it is and in the long run it will be but we aren't quite there yet.
Hot on the tail of feeding difficulties comes an engorged breast during the night that gave me so much pain it was unreal, the midwives stressing over the fact that Lucas's poo is an orange colour (which I googled and lots of b/f babies poo is orange *rolls eyes at m/w*), and that he doesn't do one daily (googled this too, and b/f babies may only do one every few days *rolls eyes at m/w. again!*) and the fact that his cord was still attached and looked bleurgh. In the case of his cord, they actually didn't say they were concerned, they just raised their eyebrows and said "oh!" whilst writing in his notes still on!!!! with that amount of exclamation marks. Luckily I managed to find other mums with similar experiences so that's good.
I have spent 4 days having daily telephone contact with a breastfeeding counsellor who has been an absolute godsend. I would hug her if she were here in person because she has talked me through every little worry, every little myth, and every stupid thing the NHS midwives have said: "oh well now you are an older mum, you have less milk so will have trouble breast feeding" (I'm 33!!!)
DH has been absolutely amazing throughout, more supportive than I could have believed possible. Its been a struggle though as work commitments meant he hasn't been able to take more than one day off yet so has been working mornings and just about keeping things afloat. Thank God for him, and for everyone in my life right now who are keeping me afloat. I'm not really up to going out yet, nor am I really up to visitors. Well that's not true, I love visitors. I'm just not ready for other peoples kids whilst I have my boobs hanging out all day. Its a shame because I know it would be nice see my friends.

So we are doing OK. Pretty much bunking in and holding on - Summer is going to be hard going; there is no pretending about it. If I make it through unscathed and in one piece I will get back to home-school in September, but for now all bets are off.

Enjoy your summer everyone.

Let Me Tell You A Story......

2011-07-27T16:13:00.000+01:00

Lucas' Birth Story
I cant tell you how shocked I was when I learnt of my pregnancy and it was a big adjustment because I knew it meant big changes for us all. My anxieties, along with wanting to consider several friends, made me decide to keep the news to myself. It wasn't hard to do given I spent most of my pregnancy in denial anyway. The pregnancy itself was uneventful and was the healthiest ever; no BP, protein or glucose issues, no swelling - it was all textbook stuff. After my last experiences with midwifes/doctors I really didn't want to go to hospital at all and was incredibly happy when I was given 'permission' to have a homebirth, though due to my anxieties I didn't decide either way what I wanted to do until the day.

On 16th which was the Saturday before he was born, I had a mucus-like 'show'. Having never had a show with any of the others I was a little worried at first but after some friends reassured me it was normal I relaxed. Monday afternoon I had another mucus 'show' and that night I had mild contractions throughout the night which weren't painful enough to get up for but were annoying enough to keep me awake. Nothing came of them though and they stopped at 5am in the morning, so more waiting... Thursday evening I felt really uncomfortable and restless as that day babys head felt like it had engaged causing a lot of pain in my pelvis and being uncomfortable when I moved. As the night went on I had a few very mild irregular contractions but didn't dare hope, so went to bed as normal. I vaguely remember waking at around 1.30am Friday morning to some contraction-like niggles but drifted back to sleep only to wake at 3.30am to regularish contractions around 10ish minutes apart. After laying there for an hour I decided to try a warm drink, still in denial I think, so went down to make Horlicks then nipped to the loo where I wiped and saw a pinkish watery show. I called the hospital who decided to send a midwife around then woke DH to let him know things were happening.
By now it was 5am and DH timed my contractions, which were 2-3mins apart for 40-60 secs, until the Midwife arrived at 5.40am followed by the second midwife about 20mins later. When the first lady arrived the contractions had started to hurt more though I was managing to breath through them but was keen for her to get everything upstairs and measure me so I could get the TENS machine on. When she examined me I was around 7-8cm dilated already which I was shocked at so we whipped on the TENS but it wasn't enough pain relief for me at that point and I asked for some Gas and Air too.
It all started to happen really quickly then. Suddenly I felt pressure and within 10 minutes began getting the first urges to push. It was action stations and we set up the floor, I got on my hands and knees and began pushing around 6.20am. Around then I couldn't cope with the gas and air anymore and became really focused and a little detached, having an odd vision of a diagram of two large posts, with a squared circle in between it- obviously representing the birth- 'twas weird, but it helped me focus and soon I knew he was coming. I pushed hard and my waters went and he crowned, then one more push and he was out. He was born 6.46am so only 1hr established labour.
It was pretty amazing and for a second I couldn't move though I could hear him cry as they cleaned him . The next thing I knew they helped me onto my back and I was holding him and feeding him. He was incredibly alert and took a really good breastfeed before nodding off. He had pooed just as he was emerging so we had to go and take up a hospital bed for 12hrs but they released us that night and it was good to be be home again. The midwives were just amazing, listening to what I wanted and really helping me through it all. The birth was amazing too, and I really feel the whole experience has been a a real healing process and a blessing for us all.

The weird image I visualised in labour.

first b//f

with big brother

in the hospital

first night at home.

Shhhh! I've got a secret.....

2011-07-22T22:10:00.000+01:00

Just a quick post to introduce you all to baby Lucas. Born at 6.46am at home after an incredibly quick 1hr labour. Weighed in at 7lb 12.5oz. All is well and I'll write again soon and fill you all in.

Things To Do Whilst You're Waiting

2011-07-20T19:17:00.002+01:00

Still nothing much to report here, just the same old same old, so I have been spending some time trying out new websites and programmes on the pc.
Since Firefox upgraded and became all weird and annoying, I have been more and more put off. N insisted I had to have Goggle Chrome because it was just so fabulous. Well, in the end I downloaded it to see what the fuss was, and it turns out that it is pretty good. Plus it still runs all my plug-ins which Firefox no longer can and it loads pretty fast which 'new' Firefox just isn't doing. So I have been playing with that for a few days.
Google Reader has been the next thing I figured out how to use and man does it make my life so much easier. I have been using it for a while but I have really started to see its full potential this week. Its handy having all my rss feeds and favourite blogs/websites to hand and really cuts down on the amount of time I spend blog-hopping.The other thing I discovered, well, was forced into using is Open Office- now I haven't quite decided on this one yet.
I had to reset my pc to factory setting and it lost Microsoft Office and I couldn't reinstall it as I had used up all my licences. I didn't want to buy a new office suite as the pc really isn't that good so I googled and found this. Having installed it and had a little play I have to say it doesn't seem as good as Office, but we'll see. I just need to get it to recognise my word documents and to figure out how to insert pictures and make them look how I want.... hmmmm. we'll see. I haven't done much else on the pc at all lately, as you can tell by the lack of posts. This blog, facebook and twitter have all been forgotten but I have, at last, finished all the planning and prep work for Seb's next two blocks; Maps and Building- here is a thumbnail sneak preview of it. Some of it anyway.

All sorts of changes

2011-07-17T08:28:00.001+01:00

There have been lots of things changing over at the Stanbury household. As well as all the crazy cook-outs and clean-a-thons that have been going on, we have also been looking at how we can cut down our workload. Or more specifically dh workload.
When he first started his allotments he's been at home for nearly three years helping me manage N. We'd had a rough ride for several years before that and he was a little, well, lost to be honest. He had no outside interests or hobbies to help. He needed something and having mentioned allotments before I suggested he take the plunge. He went from one allotment to three pretty quickly and for the next two years threw himself into making them perfect and producing amazing vegetables. In 2009 he began a horticulture course at college and that was a turning point as he came to know the others and discovered the kind of careers that were possible. As the course progressed and N improved, dh began to consider working for himself. Last year as his course came to an end he decided to do a few jobs to help out friends and neighbours; building walls, rotavating, putting up fruit cages etc and he really loved it. He worked for pittance or he bartered his time for services but he now knew what he wanted to do so he took the plunge and decided to go for it.
Since then work has increased rapidly. Word of mouth is really growing his business and he is almost too busy and having to employ casual labour for a couple jobs.
All this is great but it means that the allotments have taken a huge hit, with him barely being able to get to them more than once or twice a month. The chickens we got about 18mths ago are a hassle because dh isnt here to attend to them, I have been busy and the kids arent interested helping out. The plots he has made at home are also overrun with weeds and over ripe produce. In short its all gone to pot.
So dh has decided to cut down.He has given up chairing the allotment committee and given up his allotment plots which is a start. And with the garden we are going to dig up the fruit plot, take down the poly tunnel and lay three little plots back to lawn. We plan to try to re-home the chickens too and make the area a potio of sorts which will give Seb more space to play, hopefully a hardstanding with basketball net. We want to have a goa lpost and some lawn by the spring too so he can kick a ball around. We still want ro keep maybe one plot to grow little bits like pumpkin and squashes, potatoes and onions maybe but nothing else. We hope that within a couple of years we will move house and so the savings we can make by not having to pay for vegetable related products/ allotment rent/ buying chicken related stuff will all help. And this way if business continues like it is, DH at least ont have to work all day any most of the evening too.

Nothing Ever Happens.

2011-07-15T19:20:00.000+01:00

Nothing happens at all.... Yes its like one of those Del Amitri tunes that goes around in your head.
And really, NOTHING is happening here!!!
I had an appointment on Wednesday morning but dh was home for that and then we had a friend come around in the afternoon.
Thursday morning I went into town for a while then came home and a friend popped around for a cuppa for a couple hours.
Today I nipped to town, then had a meeting in the afternoon.
Are you bored yet? Because I am.
Seb managed 'school' on Wednesday, but Thursday and today were a write-off in favour of blowing bubbles and writing on the pavement with chalk. Emma managed Thursdays work but only did music and workbooks today, and Abi did most spending quite a bit of today on all her Botany experiments. I havent been involved in any of it which is good but means I have no idea what she actually did. Oh well! Tomorrow may be interesting, but I wouldnt like to say.
*yawn*

A Little Education

2011-07-12T12:34:00.001+01:00

Its really hard to write about what the girls do with school work as essentially its the same every day these days. Abi is working daily on her Botany/Zoology and ACE ready for September, Emma does her 4 ACE subjects, reading and workbooks each day. Both do music and French. Seb still does daily work on most days and seems to do random impropmtu educational bits too. Here is a brief summary/photo-post of what he did yesterday.
After doing 'school ' (maths,bible activity book, calendar, ORT reading, labook and Dr Dolittle) Seb went off to do lego for a couple hours. Then he did these rather fab drawings:

Chicken Lifecycle

Frog Lifecycle

Caterpillar/butterfly lifecycle

Ladybird lifecycle

By then he was bored so got the paints out and did these:

Painting with poster paints

Next he spent time 'playing' our new instrument that we bought off our good friends daughter who'd outgrown it.

our new 'toy'

The rest of the afternoon was spent on Lego.com and playing in the garden as well as loads more lego building. The girls were upstairs doing 'stuff''. Im not sure how you write about them anymore now I don't see what they are doing. I know there was drawing, laptops and music though.
And here to finish are a couple pictures so you can see the colour of our walls now dh has finished paining:

New paint on the walls

clearer showing of the two colours used

Just need to put curtains up and we'll be done.

Botany Lapbook

2011-07-11T10:12:00.000+01:00

Here are some pictures of Emma's botany lapbook that she completed last Thursday. We used Homeschool Share for the bulk of it and added some other bits from HSS linked to flowers and plants, plus a few odds and ends from HERE. We only just got on with sticking it all together today
.

Photo Round Up

2011-07-11T06:24:00.000+01:00

Drawing and accompanied story telling.

White board word-shape activities to help with spelling.

More lapbook mini-books for Sebs work

Owl Pellet dissection for Abi's botany course.

A completed Botany Lapbook for Emma.(more photos to follow)

A house in chaos whilst re-decorating takes place.

As well as:

Lego.com
Music exams
visits with frieneds
reading
making and creating with paper
and I finally finished the work I've been prepping for Seb for the coming 6 mth.

Table times and home makeovers.

2011-07-10T23:56:00.000+01:00

Its been another week of not very much. So little in fact that I can hardly recall what it included. I'd caught up to Monday last I recall so Tuesday.....
Hmm, Ah yes, we managed to do table time and Seb got a fair bit done. The girls both worked independantly with their list of bits to be done and we were all finished fairly quickly. dh took the girls to S house for Music and French in the afternoon whilst Seb played in the garden and I rested.
Wednesday also went well. We did 'school' first thing and Seb is really enjoying the wordshape activities we have been working on. The girls did their usual and then we all just hung out in the afternoon and watched National teasure. I had a visit from a friand in the evening whilst dh took Seb to Beavers and the girls to Tesco.
Thursday there was schoolwork again then I took Seb and Em to the soft play centre where Abi and I sat and drank tea whilst they played. Once home the girls got ready for their music exam -Grade 2 practical- I looked after the piano teachers kids whilst she took them. THey came home fairly confident so pleased about that.
Friday morning I dropped the girls at their friends' house and took Seb to see N and E who live nearby. We spent a lovely couple hours there, then back to fetch the girls then home by 3 - I was exhausted!
Yesterday Seb and Em swam whilst I shopped, came home and made savoury rice and soup then spent the day relaxing whilst the girls had Glee-a-thon. In the evening I helped dh shift all the books ready for painting today. And that brings us to today.
This morning we were up early and dh moved furniture and painted a whitewash over the living room ro get rid of the old dark paint colour. Seb and Em helped- lucky him. He painted the downstair w.c next whilst the kids occupied themselves, the first coat was not an easy one though. Next there was another coat on the livingroom walls, a trip out to help and elderly neighbour buy a freezer, then a final coat on the w.c and livingroom. In between that we had homemade leek and potato soup for lunch, then barbecue chicken pasta for tea with garlic bread followed by apple pie for dessert. This evening dh was finally able to return our furniture to its proper places so tomorrow we get the grand job of re-loading four bookshelves, putting away toys and vacuuming the downstairs. Oh and I found my photos so a couple of photoposts to follow.

The Best Laid Plans . . .

2011-07-04T20:38:00.003+01:00

So you may have gathered that things didn't quite go to plan. Seb had a gym competition at 9am on Sunday which immediately interfered with the 'Big Clean'. It was only an in-house competition but dh had to stay with him so he was stuck there for 1.5 hours. I painted the bits of the kitchen that needed a touch up, the conservatory area where the damp had been and the same in the bathroom, our room and hallway. They were back from the comp, with Seb touting his certificate, t-shirt and medal, barely 10 minutes when Abi and Em called to be picked up from the train station after their sleepover. So dh dashed out to do that whilst I made choc chip slices and choc and raisin rock cake. He then took Emma to her competition and finally got home and got started on the list. In the end he got two-thirds of it done with a couple little stops to fetch Em, and then later pick them up after I had dropped them in town.
I had bought the wrong size blind for our bathroom so he had to get that returned to Argos, then he dashed back to Vax the carpets in the conservatory, through-room and dining room. I did very little in the way of food for dinner and we all just had leftovers from Saturdays barbeque instead. I think we finally finished at around 9pm and still had loads left to do. It was all a bit frustrating.

Today was a write off too as I woke at 4am with a migraine and felt really really sick. I havent had one this bad for quite a while so it knocked me for six. Between spending time with my head down the toilet and laying with a cold flannel over my eyes it wasnt a great start to the morning. By the time it got to around 10am I was feeling a bit better but I wrote off school work for Seb pretty much as I was looking after M anyway and didnt feel up to a fight.So M arrived and they went off to play. Abi and Emma were already working hard on their stuff in the garden so I made 6 litres of cheese sauce for freezing then collapsed back on the sofa until M's mum arrived. We had lunch together then I had to brave Asda and pick up some bits we seemd to have run out of. (As an aside, how do we manage to do a big shop only two days ago and STILL run out of stuff!!!) It was hard going being in the hot car whilst still feeling sick but I put the air-con on and managed it. Once home and quickly unpacked I laid down again and next thing I knew I was waking up to find it was nearly 5 o'clock and dh was home. Ooops!
So tea was made very quickly and then dh did the rest of the vaxing whilst I laid around looking pathetic lol. Im hoping tomorrow will bring a better day and that this migraine will have gone, it's meant to be cooler so maybe that'll help.

Taking It Easy

2011-07-03T07:23:00.000+01:00

There hasn't been much to say over the last week really. We have been enjoying the slower pace that summer brings to HE and at the same time there has been a great deal of sorting, organising and planning going on.
Tuesday I had a hospital appointment and ended up waiting an hour and fifteen minutes for a ten minute, almost pointless, appointment. Afterwards I spent the afternoon with my friend who had looked after Seb and Em for me.

Wednesday was slow and quiet with us plodding along. Seb had done 'school' but around 9am and played on the computer for a bit before indulging in a day of lego and sword fighting (there was an invisible ninja in our garden)

Thursday we had a lovely visit from R who has four children, two are around Sebs age and they get on so well together. R and I get on well too and she is such a gentle lovely person and has such a calming influence on everyone. Thanks to her I have finally found THE best sunblinds ever for my car: WindowSox! And we are going to order some pretty soon. They stayed for a few hours and spent loads of time playing which Seb desperately needed, and left around 2ish which then left me the afternoon for tidying and pottering about.

Friday was HE group which was the penultimate meeting before the summer. This week was a science theme and Seb spent most of the morning deconstructing and reconstructing a model eye. We left there a little early as I had to renew the photo on my driving licence (and get charged £20 for the privilege), then did a food shop by which time I was wiped out and had to have a nap. Later on we had a visit from a friend and her dd who ended up taking the girls away with them for the weekend. We had chinese for tea and a late bedtime.

Saturday first thing I had to nip to the chemist and pick up some Epsom salts which apparently help tired feet and dry skin. Then to Tesco to buy supplies for an impromptu barbecue. At around 4ish S came over with M who I usually look after, her dp, and her parents and we had a lovely barbecue. It was a lovely time and I do adore her family so much. By 9pm though we were glad they were ready to go and then proceeded with the tidying up. Seb didnt get to bed before around 9.30 and we weren't far behind.

Today is dh day off and we have a list of jobs to get done. If we can achieve it, it'll be the last lot of jobs left to do and then we might get to enjoy Sundays and slow down a bit. This is the trouble with him working so much; jobs at home just keep on piling up and up and now there are around 20 little jobs for him to do. Most of them are things I cant do either, which means its down to him to get things done. I'll let you know how I get on....

Transitions

2011-06-29T19:09:00.000+01:00

This post has been knocking around in my blogger drafts for a while now but today seems like the day for it.

If you stop and look at what transitions a person faces in one day there are so many; sleeping to waking, home to school, school to play, play to dinner, dinner to bath, bath to bed. That is just an example of a childs' average day. For the average child that would seem like reasonable stuff but Seb has a problem with transitions. They make him frustrated and angry, and causes him to see red. Every request to switch gears causes him to roar and argue as like it was the hardest request ever and its all to do with adaptability. He is the kind of determined person who knows what he wants to do, how he wants to do it and that, quite frankly is that. He needs time to change track from one thing to another, not easy when we have such busy days. I have been learning all about these things from this book I am reading: Raising Your Spirited Child. Its been really interesting in lots of ways over the last couple of months.
He isn't the only one who struggles with transitions and its an issue for Nathan too. Today he has gone to Yeovil College for orienteering day; a fab meet and greet opportunity and a chance to meet those in his new form. Except Nathan isn't with anyone he knows, he is with new people, and a new tutor in a strange place. To an outsider he is being difficult because he doesn't want to get out of bed, then dithers getting ready, is slow to breakfast and then leaves late because its only "team building activities" first. But actually transitions are really, really hard for him. What looks like a person who cant be arsed is actually someone who is struggling with something new and to adapt to what is happening.
But they must have gotten this from somewhere, so who? Funnily enough, I don't like transitions either. I am not so bad and the boys, kind of more middlish because mostly I can adapt. But there are two situations that come to mind that I particularly struggle with.
The first thing is mornings. When I wake up I like to lay there a while, have a cuppa/breakfast, read emails, get down stairs and do any household chores then probably another cuppa before my day begins. DH likes to wake up, dress, drink tea and leave for work. He used to bring me tea then leave but that really made me angry because then I was woken up too late, there was too much to do, Seb would come in when I wasn't ready and my day seemed to just go wrong. We had argument after argument that he never did anything when he got up and I had too much. In reality, it was my stuff that needed doing and he couldn't do it anyway, but what I was really needing was time to do it. So in the end it means he gets me up 1 - 1.5hrs before he leaves for work, and yes, that's early sometimes but at least I am less stressed.
Another transition I dislike is when I am focusing on something and DH will talk about, or question be about something else. At the weekend I was shifting furniture and organising after our mold discovery. I walked in the Kitchen carrying stuff to be gotten rid of; I was in tidying mode. He obviously realising the time started to sort food for tea and asked me what he should start on. Because I don't adapt quickly enough to change track, I was furious and frustrated and cross that he had even mentioned tea, and couldnt he see I was cleaning and why did he always have to start throwing demands at me when I was so busy.

So yes, I have trouble with transitions too and the key to what is needed for those with adaptability/transition issues is forethought and time. Its amazing what you can learn about yourself from reading a book about raising kids.

Slowly Slowly

2011-06-27T23:23:00.001+01:00

A slightly slower pace to today thank goodness. Seb once again decided that 6am was a fabulous time to wake up, to which I was far from impressed. DH took him down stairs and made me some toast for breakfast so I had sometime to come around before he left. By the time I had eaten, dressed, sorted dry washing and come downstairs dh had started schoolwork with Seb and was readdy to leave - yep, here school begins at 7am *rolls eyes* Seb had finished by 8am, the girls strolled down at 9am, did around 30 mins work then it was time to take Abi to her quarterly appointment. It was fine again and dispite the hideous daily results, her long range results were spot on. How she manages it each time it I do not know! We got charged £3 to park in the hospital carpark for an hour which is a ridiculous price and almost double what an hours parking should be but I didn't feel up to complaining about the issue!
Once home we ate whilst watching Tom and Jerry. Sebs lego arrived just as the girls and dh headed to French and music so he spent the afternoon on that whilst I slept. We had pizza for tea then McFlurry before showers and bedtimes. This evening I chatted on the phone for a while, we spent a couple hours talking which was nice but left me with more questions as is always the case. I have some blog posts in Draft but I dont feel like editting them at this time of night, and now I cant sleep either,lol

A job well done

2011-06-26T23:48:00.002+01:00

Wow! Isn't this weather amazing! I would like to say Welcome Summer but it seems we only have this for a few hours longer and then its back to below average temps and some rain showers.

Saturday first thing dh took Em and Seb to their swimming lesson Whilst Abi and I went to wilkos to purchase a few bits for Abis science experiments. DH dropped them off to me in Peacocks so that I could spend my 40% off vouchers before the date ran out. We did really well despite a few moments and ended up spending £56 but that was with a £48 saving so I was very impressed. Next I drove to Tesco and Seb and I waited in the car whilst Abi and Emma did my shopping for me. Have I mentioned how great it is having older girls *grin* Whilst they were gone Seb and I did some impromptu money maths as he wanted to count my money and I orchestrated getting him to add varying amounts together.
We headed home and had a quiet day doing not much. Emma made meringues which were lovely but seemed to deflate upon cooling so we crushed them up for tea. Everyone played and occupied themselves and we watched a film together for an hour or so. DH came home early then headed over to the allotment and came home with 4 cauliflowers, 4 bin bags of carrots, garlic and 70 more onions. We had pesto pasta with bacon for tea and then strawberries, meringues and clotted cream for pudding. The evening was more chaotic as dh chopped and blanched veg whilst I painted door frames and varnished our shoe rack.We were both knackered by bedtime and I slept better than I have in a while.

Today was another busy one. Seb woke us before 6 - I was NOT impressed. We were up before seven and started work on the conservatory. This basically entailed emptying three half-size book cases and six cupboards, removing worktops and cutting to size, vacuuming screwing together two double cupboards attaching worktop, emptying a full size book case and carrying it into the conservatory, filling it and all the cupboards, bringing another book case downstairs and filling it with books/toys, taking toys upstairs re arranging Sebs shelves, putting a half bookcase in the landing, one in our room and one in the attic, filling the two upstairs, scrubbed mold twice, painted with mold resistant paint and finally collapsed in a heap on sofas - If you are exhausted reading it, I can assure you I was exhausted too. After cauliflower cheese for tea I showered quickly and put Seb to bed whilst dh blanched, drained and froze cauli and carrots, then planed the airing cupboard door in Nathans room. We finally crawled into bed about 20 minutes ago and dh is asleep already.
I'm just glad to be ticking things off my rather long 'To-Do' list because I really need bits out of the way before Summer hits.

Rounding up again.

2011-06-24T22:38:00.001+01:00

Well Im not sure how we got to Friday already without me knowing it. I really feel like I'm on a constant fast forward right now. Except of course, in areas that I want speeded up; they are dragging!!!

I haven't been out all week really. I haven't felt my best so I've just hidden out at home and chilled as best as is possible. School work happened every day and ran pretty smoothly over all and when not doing school work the kids have played imaginary games, drawn pictures, coloured, used the computer, watched DVDs and helped out around the house.
Monday afternoon dh took Abi and Emma to French/Music and I took Seb to the park for 1/2 hour although i paid for it later as I felt worse, Tuseday was Bicton for Abi (last week next week, woohoo!) then dh took Seb to Gym, Wednesday morning I had a Drs appointent which was very encouraging, then in the evening Seb had Beavers. We ate out which again didn't agree with me, though I enjoyed the food. Thursday was a quiet day mostly. Abi and Em had a friend around in the afternoon and DH got stung by bees which was a littl stressful. He was sat in casualty for over an hour without being seen before finally deciding that as he hadn't dropped dead he was probably going to be fine, and left. This morning was messy day at HEY and there was lots of messy activities for the kids, though I avoided it all. Afterwards I dozed on the sofa whilst Em made buns, then a friend popped around for a short visit. Oh and today was Nathan's final exam - fingers crossed for them both until July/Aug time now. Tomorrow is swimming and then shopping- urgh! and Sunday we have some mold to treat in the conservatory - joy. Overall not a bad week but nothing exciting either and I hope I feel better again soon.

Fathers Day

2011-06-20T01:22:00.000+01:00

No pancakes for me in the end, but I dont mind really. Seb woke us at around 5 to ask if we were going swimming. Obviously not at that time in the morning, so he climbed into bed and both he and dh went back to sleep. I didn't, and have been awake since. Joy! We didnt do much for fathers day but Dh liked his Fathers Day Present - Fast and Furious 1-4.

Dh took Emma and Seb swimming at a pool about 20 minutes away from here for a couple hours to give me time to print up all the school-work bits that I need for the next few blocks of work. As if that was enough time! Due to a completely inadequate word processing progamme (MSWorks, grrrrr!) I had several false starts, had only managed to print 3 pages, and ended up downloading Open Office which so far is MUCH better. I finally got the first lot printed by lunch time but decided that I was printing no more, as sitting on kitchen chairs manning the printer was beginning to get on my nerves. In the meantime dh had cooked 6 cup cakes ('cup' because it uses all cup measures and no eggs or fat), One each of cherry, blueberry, pineapple and raspberry tray bake cakes and choclate rock cakes. Once cool I helped him divide it all up into sixes for meal portions then wrapped it all for freezing.

At that point Seb and dh went off to the allotment whilst I went into the living room to continue my orgo-planning, two hours later I woke to the sound of them returning home having fallen asleep and done nothing plan-worthy. Must have needed the sleep though. Dh came home with four black bags of onions, four bags of carrots, four cauliflowers and two bags of peas. We don't have as much produce as last year but its to be expected really, dh just has no time and this is the first time he has been there in over a week. An allotment just needs so much more time than he has these days.
I cooked a curry for tea, then put Seb in the bath whilst dh dropped Abi at cell group. The evening was mainly tv watching, bedtimes, fetching Abi and more orgo-planning. On the subject of that I drew a not-to-scale plan of both his room and our house, 'twas quite good fun actually - took ages though and we ended up staying up to watch Fast and Furious 1; I do rather like this film though not entirely sure why. And no, it doesn't have to do with Vin Deisel being in it, Yuck!! Only just finished planning unit two so will try and print it tomorrow if I get chance, in the meantime I ought to get some sleep no matter how tempted I am to plan unit 3.

Whistle - stop tour of the week.

2011-06-19T06:50:00.000+01:00

This week has flown by faster than I can keep up with, even though the daily grind has been the same. Im not sure if I can even recall a snippet of impressive learning, structured or autonomous because in truth its been a slack week.
Monday was of course the exam day which involved running around a-plenty for me and as little work as they could possibly get away with for Seb and Emma. DH took them to the allotment and tip whilst I was out and they did a few other bits and pieces too.
Tuesday morning whilst Abi and DH went off to Bicton we nipped to Tesco and bought some 'picky' lunch and then had friends to visit for a few hours in the afternoon, so no 'Ed' going on at home that day. I went to cell in the evening.
Wednesday I looked after my friend's little girl from early in the morning, then had a Drs appointment at 9 before having a friend turn up at around 11 so nothing 'HE-like' got done on that day either.
Thursday was of course Emma's birthday so it was another day off for us although there was loads of lounging, lego and tv.
And Friday we went to HEY in the morning which was a good morning and included cheese balls and proper lemon meringue pie then a rest in the afternoon so nothing exciting to report then either.

Seb did have a clock moment where he played with her learning clock and was showing us all the O'clock hours, then we briefly talked about 'half past'. Emma did do her music and also spent time reading and, after Thursday, watching loads of shows on iplayer. Abi has now turned her attention to Science and is working furiously at her ACE workbooks as well as her Zoology and Botany work.

I got another 'herman' this week too which is going to be fun to grow again. I have been mapping out my ideas for our next work units for Seb as I want to get them printed, purchased and ready to go before July. Yesterday we had a friend around for the afternoon to play with Seb whilst the mum and I got to chat. Today is Fathers day and I have failed miserably by not getting dh a card :( but my excuse is I havent been out to shop properly this week. Hopefully he'll forgive me once he sees his present. Hopefully there will be pancakes, then Em, Seb and dh are off swimming as part of Emma's birthday treat. Not sure about the rest of the day will hold, its meant to be a cooking day but I shall see.

Birthday Girl

2011-06-16T20:22:00.002+01:00

Emma was up at five today, clearly the excitement was too much for her. She then wandered aimlessly until we finally relented and got up just before 7. She could barely wait to open her stash of stuff.

And here she is with her presents; a laptop, weaving loom and wool, a Myriad sewing kt, and a necklace from Abi. She got some money too and is very happy.

We had a quiet day overall, doing little in the way of school and everyone just pottering instead. Then in the evening we had tea and of course cake. She requested coffee cake this year which is one of my favourites.. Love this photo of Em counting her candles to see if we put 11 on, just in case, lol.

Happy Birthday Emma.

Wow, what a day!

2011-06-13T22:49:00.001+01:00

The day of the dreaded Maths module exam arrived. I cant say I've been looking forward to it, that's for sure, and I know Abi hasn't. We did one more past paper and she improved her mark on last time from an F to a D so thats something and we spent some time picking out key words with highlighters and looking at marking schemes so she knew what they wanted. Other than that its up to her to do her best.
We set off at 11 to get to another girl who was doing the exam stopping in Morrisons to buy lunch, which we ate there. Then I took us to the next person and the mum drove us to the exam centre, we settled the girls in then went to grab coffee whilst we waited for the hour paper to be over. The girls walked to meet us after the exam -all smiling and saying it was a good paper, so fingers crossed- then we had to walk back to the car, drive back to the first girls home, I drove the second girl and her mum home, then I drove home. Phew! Boy was I exhausted after that and slept for a little bit once we got home. This evening I havent done a great deal other than have a bath, put my feet up and sort out dd birthday present. So much planning and printing to do but it will just have to wait. Bed time is more important right now.

Things to do at the weekend.

2011-06-12T19:03:00.001+01:00

So what does a slightly crazy mother of four do on a wet June weekend? Well, mass cooking of course!
Seb was unable to swim still due to the burns on his fingers so he stayed home with me and went on Lego.com whilst dh took Emma. Once back we waited for the courier to collect N old laptop (again!!) after discovering it was broken (again!!). By that time dh, who was meant to be working, arrived home having turned up at work to find no-one there so I decided to write a shopping list and then cook en masse which should save us time with all the busy-ness that is going on around here.
Two and a half hours later we had been shopping and were home making cheesy vegetable cobbler x3, turkey and potato pie x3, meatloaf x3 (that will actually be cut in half to make 6 meals). It took us a good few hours to get that lot finished off and we ended up having a really quick fry-up tea and then

Today I woke up before six so I got started early with the cooking so we could get it all done and finished. I switched on the potatoes which we were baking. They are perfect for freezing and you can just take them out and re-heat them for an hour. Dh got up shortly after and chopped the meat for beef stew in the slowcooker and the chicken for curry, I got both of those cooking whilst dh peels lots of potatoes (10kg in all!!) to add to all the different dishes. After the curry was cooked we made shepherds pie. By this time Seb and I had to got to a party so we left dh in charge of the spicy chilli-sausage hash (which is like corned beef hash but corned beef is now £2 per tin so sausages were actually cheaper!!). He also prepared and froze some potato wedges. By the time we got home at five, he had boxed up curry x3, shepherds pie x3, beef stew x3 and hash x4.

This evening he and I are both worn out so aren't going to cook the deserts I had planned. I think they'll have to wait until tomorrow. Emma is at an indoor-barbecue till 8pm and we're waiting for Abi to call us when she is nearly home from Poole where she has been swimming today so once they are collected we are definitely going to bed.

Sometimes good stuff happens :o)

2011-06-10T19:20:00.046+01:00

See! Its not all doom and gloom around here :)
Wedneday morning Seb woke up early. I was kind of hoping he wouldn't after the late night and all the previous days' stress but he was wide awake at 6.50am, unlike the rest of us. His saving grace was to ask us how Lego was made so we googled and YouTube'd for videos and watched some good Discovery Channel ones all about it.
The rest of the day was spent pretty much on the sofa doing not alot. We watched DVDs together, I napped (quite a lot) and Seb played with his Lego. The girls did some work but over all we really did very little. I did spend a fair amount of time on the phone sorting out an appointment for Seb to get his dressings changed which was a bit of a palava but sorted in the end.
Thursday morning we took Seb to get his dressing changed at a medical centre across town from us. We were pleased when the nurse said he didn't need a full bandage AND didn't need to see him again. She agreed that the burn really was so superficial that it didn't require a trip to Bristol and the policies are so ridiculous at times. Ah well. The rest of the day was the same as Wednesday; napping, film watching and lego.
Today we went to HEY. We weren't going to originally but his fingers were better and I was desperate to see adults so we bit the bullet and went. Some ladies came to do a weaving workshop today which Emma really loved and she spent the whole morning having a go at all the weaving looms they had bought with them. Seb was his usual self and played outside pretty much all morning with an interlude to play play dough and some time doing a little sport. This afternoon he went on the laptop, Abi did maths and Em did reading and the plumber came to do a follow-up check on our new boiler. This evening was a bit of an achievement as Seb read something off the Tom and Jerry DVD he was watching, now I feel like he is finally getting somewhere with reading.
All in all a good day but I really need an early night!!.

Tears before bedtime....

2011-06-07T22:45:00.002+01:00

The last two days have been decidedly horrible - there is nothing to say about it really.
Yesterday I came down to discover oldest ds had stayed up all night, not only that but had left on lights, computer, laptop, TVs, radio, left the fridge open and the front door open. This was followed by Seb refusing to do more than three subjects, Emma taking 1.5 hours to do 2 pages of math, Abi getting an F in her mock exam paper due to being completely unable to understand what to do, my computer needing to be restored to factory settings because it didn't recognise windows anymore, then once restored refusing to acknowledge my printer which then required manual installations. By lunch there had definitely been tears which was followed by me having to drive the girls to Music whilst dh stayed here to sort out about getting our old washing machine fixed. It seemed pointless seeing as we have a new one but as he said, he HAS paid the warranty so he has a right to it being fixed. Driving was an effort and I nearly drove into a hedge (not sure how, I still say the hedge jumped into the road).

Today hasn't been much better. Not only was there my 4.20am start and a row with Emma before breakfast, I switched the iron on ready to iron a beautiful hama-bead picture Seb had done by himself, then nipped to the loo only to come back and discover Seb had touched it " I was seeing if it was hot" FFS!!!! He discovered it was, funnily enough, so I plunged it into cold water for 15 minutes, gave him calpol then thought I'd best take him to a&e just in case it needed a dressing. As dh had the car I had to scrounge money from Emma to get the bus and left her with Nathan. Got to a&e and had to wait 4 hours to be seen by a doctor only to be be told that they didn't do children's burns (even though it was a tiny one) so we had to go to Frenchay hospital in Bristol. I can't tell you how ridiculous this is. For a start Yeovil knew he was both a burns case and a child when we got there so must of known they didn't do child burns, on top of that there are two tiny burns (think the size of pencil-top rubber size) on the inside crease of two of his fingers- hardly serious, also the Dr's all agreed that they were superficial burns (he saw 4 Dr's) so nothing to worry about, and lastly Yeovil do this as policy rather than judging case-by-case on severity.

When oldest ds poured tea all down himself it was far more severe and the blisters were far worse and they STILL only saw him in the local a&e, slapped cream on and bandaged it. So anyway, we went home and ate tea first and dh took him on the 1.5hr drive to Bristol which ended up taking 2 1/4 hours thanks to traffic. They had to wait nearly 2 hours to see a Dr who dressed it and they were finally released at 9.30pm. They walked in around five minutes ago with Seb sporting a rather cute bandage. More annoying news is we may have to go back to Bristol if they cant arrange for us to attend a burns clinic locally. Sigh. Anyway so it seems they wanted to burst the blisters and see how deep they were but Seb wouldn't let them; can't imagine why! So now it's a case of bandage and wait until its redressed to have another look.
So that's my horrible two days. I am tired and irritated, and am officially on strike until further notice!!!

Soggy Sunday

2011-06-05T23:29:00.000+01:00

What a contrast to yesterday. Its cooler (not that Im complaining as I didn't do so well in the heat) and the rain is pooring down. Not too upset about the rain though as the gardens and allotments need it, and dh dad is a farmer so is very glad of it.
Dh kindly made pancakes for breakfast again and very nice they were too! After that he got stuck into the list of jobs he had for today whilst I got stuck into laundry; so exciting! The girls did their music practice, then seb played on the Wii, Em pottered around and Abi did another math paper which I then marked. Dh and Em went to tesco and B and Q, then back home for lunch before we headed out to a barbecue at our friends' house. The rain held off mostly and it was a lovely three hours spent there beofre dashing home for dh to do more house stuff. I did more laundry, fed various children, tidied and sorted our bookshelves (in other words went totally OCD and lined them up in size order and according to subject ) as well as removing rubbish books for selling on/giving away.I put Seb to bed then stupidly began the mammouth task of resetting our old desktop to factory settings. I started off well but lost momentum when I realised that there were 113 updates so I have left them downloading and installing and come to bed. Hopefully nothing awful will happen and I can finish off in the morning.

Sunny Saturday.

2011-06-04T21:56:00.001+01:00

We woke to glorious sunshine again this morning though slightly breezier than yesterday. I washed our bedding first thing whilst dh dropped Abi at Tesco to spend her money then took Em and Seb to their swimming lesson. Seb bought the last small lego hero with his pocket money and spent time assembling it, then asking me to print of the instructions for the big model (made by combining his little model with the one he got a couple weeks ago) Emma helped him make it and he played with it most of the morning.

I made some bread dough and left it to rise then we all piled in the car and went to town so Em and Abi could spend their money. Seb is going through a 'I'm-not-getting-out-the-car' phase so I sat in with him whilst the girls went to shop. It is handy having bigger girls who are able to shop on their own.

Once home we had lunch then I shaped, rose and baked the bread. I spent the afternoon on laundary again and managed a short sleep before dh got home. Whilst I was napping the kids kept themselves occupied with computers, knitting, sewing and drawing. As well as playing outside in the sand and on the trampoline.

I put all our butter into a dish and stuck it back nto the fridge to set a bit more ready for tea time.

Dh and Seb then got stuck into painting the wall in the garden whilst I was cooking tea. It was overdue for a lick of paint and now looks so much better for it.

For tea I did tomato/mascarpone pasta with the homemade bread and butter -delicious!! After tea there were baths and then bed. Dh and I sat out in the garden for a while enjoying the lovely white walls although by now it was turning windy and decidedly thundery, no rain yet though. And now Im kackered again so it must be bedtime. :)

Hot!

2011-06-03T20:55:00.000+01:00

And it really has been today.
This is the kind of weather I love getting out of bed for in the mornings which is a good job seeing as dh went to work at 6 this morning and I got up too. It was nice actually as I got lots of bits done and then had time to sit in the conservatory where it was nice and cool and read my emails etc. I tried my new washing machine out this morning as well and sat with trepidation throughout the wash to make sure it worked. It did, and boy was it quiet. I mean really quiet in that Seb slept though it and stayed in bed until 8am.
Abi was picked up at 9am to go and help out at kids club and Seb, Em, and I went and did some shopping. I had to buy a couple tops each for the girls, shorts for Em and jogging bottoms for Seb as well as a new bedding set and a cat carrier. I also bought some bottles and muslin from Wilkos ready for the elderflower cordial. There was a bit od drama when we reached town and realised that Seb had forgotten to put shoes on. Honestly, I must have the only child who doesnt feel that shoes are necessary for going out in *sigh*. So he walked in just his socks seeing as it wasnt that far between shops. By the time we got home I had enough time to hang out some washing, pick in dry clothes, chop chicken and empty the dishwasher before having to head out to collect Abi, luckily Nathan was home and able to sit with Seb and Emma whilst I nipped out. In our absence our Red House parcel arrived with loads of goodies to look through.

Once home I was well and truly in need of a rest so Em, bless her, made my lunch for me. The afternoon was nothing exciting. It was a bit too hot to be outside so we took refuge in the front of the house and had all the windows and doors open to let the wind blow through. Seb printed some more pictures from the Lego site and mounted them on lolly sticks, he played in the garden with Emma some of the time and did a jigsaw when he couldn't bear it any longer.

Emma did her music practice and went on the computer as well as doing some jobs for me then just hung out upstairs reading and listening to music. Abi did another math test paper today and her music, then pottered around in the bathroom undertaking some vital hair removal procedure with cream purchased today,lol. She went out for a while but was hot too so came in and retreated to her room.
There were several more laundry loads and some tea prep then we strained and bottled 5 bottles of elderflower cordial.

There was some left over and all parties think it tastes rather yummy. We had curry for tea, folded laundry and then Emma wanted to make butter using cream. I warned her it was tough going but she wasn't convinced until she'd been shaking 10 minutes and still had to shake for around another 15 more. Still it looks like it worked pretty well and we saved the buttermilk to use in cooking at some point.

We did all the baths and have since just been hanging out upstairs on my bed trying to cool down in front of the fan - 'tisn't working,lol
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Activity Central

2011-06-02T21:19:00.002+01:00

We've had an eventful few days here. Tuesday morning was spent planning whilst Seb created a game with his lego and a huge cardboard box. After that we got a little work done on his lapbook and did some nature study in the form of studying our butterflies that had just hatched. He drew a picture of them in their house and coloured it in. In the afternoon he wanted to go on Lego Hero Factory to play some games, printed out some pictures of lego city figues which he coloured and I helped him attach to lollypop sticks. (who'd have thought my random craft stash would come in handy) He printed out some colouring pages too and spent a really long time on them.
DH bought the girls back with him at around 4pm. They'd been for a sleepover with the girl whose mum teaches them music and french, which they had also done whilst they were there. They came bearing elderflowers too so I made a heap of elderflower cordial which is sitting on the side in my kitchen 'steeping' - I think thats the word - whilst waiting for me to buy muslins and bottles.

Wednesday and today we had the plumber here finally fitting our new (and long-awaited) combi-boiler. The plumber who did the work was fabulous with Seb. He and his mate let Seb tail them almost constantly, answered his questions patiently and let him hand them stuff without a problem. They spent ages telling him what they were doing and why, what their tools were called and what they were for. As well as this they installed it all, replumbed a shower, put up two new radiators, removed an old back-boiler and put a flue through the roof all in two days!! We are left with some decorating to do where the old radiator was, plus we need to board up the fire place and put new shelves in our airing cupboard so dh has his work cut out for him this weekend but its all done now and we are happy. We were planning a mass cook out at the weekend but the house and garden need to be priority number 1 for now so I think I'll save that for next weekend.

Wednesday morning Herman, our friendship cake, was ready to divide and give out to three people so we did that as we were off to meet up with friends at Sherborne Castle for a bit of a run around. It was lovely to get out for a while and see some friends and it blew away the cobwebs a bit even if I was tired for the rest of the day.

Today has been a mixed bag of activity. First thing this morning we cooked Herman, which after ten days of growing and feeding was finally ready for baking. I added the ingredients and baked him and was completely impressed with how well he cooked (and he was delicious with custard later too).

Then we noticed our washing mashing had broken down for the 17th (and final!!!) time. Dh came home having had an x-ray on his knee for some knee pain he's been having and tried to fix it but couldn't so we rang the Whatever Happens people who, for the record are complete tossers, to try and get it fixed. First they tried telling us we weren't covered - until we told them they were still taking our money each month, then they said we were only contracted for 5 years until we quoted the bit from the contract saying it was a rolling monthly contract, they then said they might send someone in around 5-10 days. We pointed out that our contract said an engineer visit was guaranteed within two working days to which they said they couldn't do anything and it would be five days or less if someone else cancelled. Grrrrr! Then they said the parts would take 14 working days after the engineer had been out to see the machine so that was effectively 21(ish) days without a machine) DH rang up customer care to complain and they are 'looking into it' but we couldn't go that long without washing so we had to grovel to my parents to lend us the money for a new one. We ended up going for a Hotpoint which we felt (hope!) was a trusted and reliable make this time. DH picked it up in the evening and S came over to help him lift it into the house.

During the morning I also had a meeting at the college with Nathan to see what help he may need in place. It was generally a positive meeting although its always hard for Nathan because he hates to think of himself has having any kind of need, or needing extra support but hopefully it will be a useful thing to have a few 'get-out' clauses and strategies in place.
This afternoon Emma and I spent time helping Seb make a picture he saw in his Usborne art/craft book of a spooky scene. I helped with some cutting out and he did sticking, drawing etc.

This evening we had to take Willow to the vets due to some seriously weeping eyes and it looks like she may have hayfever! Ive never heard anything about cats having it before and almost choked when he said so. The vet isn't sure so has given her eyedrops which will cure a tear duct problem if its that and we have to medicate for 10 days, stop and if the weeping continues its hayfever. Bizarre!

Tonight I had a nice HE moment with Emma discussing the difference between retail parks, business parks and inustrial parks(estates) - very interesting stuff. And Abi is working more calmly with her math. It's still a struggle and she is looking at a D roughly right now but its a top D so she may get lucky on the day. Either way she has lots more practice papers, past papers and revision guides to attempt so fingers crossed she'll get the hang of it before then.

HE Planning Roundup.

2011-05-31T07:08:00.000+01:00

I hate it when I write a post late at night then realise it makes no sense whatsoever and have to delete it, hence what happened to my last post. It was meant to discuss where we are and whether we were on track but the flow was wrong.
So lets try again...
Things are running pretty much to plan so far so Im hoping to keep it that way. Abi has her Math exam in 12 days so that time will be totally focused on Math; practice papers, revision guides, online math practice. On top of that the girls need to do their music which involves 40mins a day practice ready for their exam that is coming up soon. So that will be Abi's world for a while and then after the exam she will have a week or two to catch up on Botany/Zoology. She is also reading Wuthering Heights and will continue with that.
Em is right on track with her ACE and is going to finish level 6 within the month. She will go back to level 5 and do British History then we are going to stop social studies for a while so she can do other things. She is loving her botany work and her botany knowledge is putting dh horticulture qualification to shame. He was really surprised to learn that she was covering things in a more in-depth way than he did in the course. And she surprised him with some of what she knew. She is still reading Pride and Prejudice (I am shocked) and will continue with it too. For her Lapbooks, Art, logic and thinking skill workbooks, and reading are big around here right now so thats her next on the agenda for her.

Seb is 1/4 of the way through his lapbook having finished frogs and now being ready for butterflies. Its a little behind but not terribly so, I do need to try and keep to schedule though because I know we have a hectic July. I plan to get July through September's work printed up for him so we can keep the flow going and I wont have to stress. He is nearly at the end of ETC primer C so I need to get ETC 1, 1 1/2 and 2 purchased, and I also want to buy the first set of Singapore Math so he can move straight on from Earlybird Math without having to wait. Not sure whether to do Pri 3rd Edition like his sisters or whether to move on to Standards Edition which is more colourful and up to date.We'll continue with ORT too. Other than that its all good and I am considering Sonlight LA and Science from September as well as Ambleside Online K readalouds.

From September:
Abi will be doing GCSE Math modules 2 and 3 (not with me though!), Zoology 1 and 2, French, and Grade 2 Theory .
Em will be doing ACE English, Math and Science plus lapbooks, Fench, art and music study plus Grade 2 Theory.
Seb will continue his Maps and Building modules, Math, Phonics and Bible with some Sonlight thrown in maybe.

Rainy Spring Days

2011-05-30T18:33:00.001+01:00

Ah, the weather is decidedly cooler today, and the garden is definitely grateful for the rain even if I'm not that impressed.
We had paid to go to Sherborne Country Fair but with the weather as it was dh volunteered to take the kids for me and I stayed home to have some rest and do housework (not quite sure how the two go together, but there you go ) I didn't mind too much really as I don't own wellies and my rain coat doesnt fit anymore - instead I unloaded the dishwasher, washed and hung laundry, did some dishes and tidied up a bit. Then I got a little rest and read my book for a bit.
By all accounts the kids had a fab time playing hook-a-duck, riding on donkeys, seeing otters and horses. There were stalls, a circus marquee, crafts and demonstrations. Unfortunately dh failed to take any pictures so no evidence of their fun.They got back at 2pm and were all cold and shivery so baths for all. Abi and Em did their French and packed for their sleepover whilst Seb, N dh and I ate pizza for tea and by the time we'd eaten the sun was shining. How weird the weather is in May.
Dh left to take the girls to thier sleepover at around half five, then he is heading out for the evening with a friend of his so it's just Seb, N and me this evening. Im not complaining though, tonight it's just me, schoolwork planning and Springwatch!

Emerging From The Dark

2011-05-28T18:30:00.000+01:00

A rubbish few days to report here unfortunately. More unkind people with nothing nice to say which has left the whole family a bit shaken and rocked. On Wednesday I had to deal with a health professional who really upset me and left me in 24 hours worth of termoil. On Thursday Abi and I had the worst argument we have had in a long time and hurtful things were said. Then last night and today we have had issues with Nathan that I cant blog but which are just too unpleasant. Its meant dh losing 3 days money, a holiday having to be cancelled and generally life being a bit rubbish.
*Sigh - and breath.....*

So what can I salvage from the week?
Well Seb has moved on to the blue ORT books and seems to be responding well to the positivity about himself from us. Emma has worked well all week. And Abi did do so much better with her work on Friday so hopefully we are friends again. Dh, the girls and I had a nice night Friday evening watching a film together. I haven't been feeling ill at all - stressed, but not ill, so thats good - and Em learnt how to do butterfly stroke today.
So there are a few things to cling on to and all I can do is hold on tight and hope for a better day tomorrow.

Books and Friendship Cake.

2011-05-24T21:45:00.000+01:00

We had such a lovely day today.
Seb, Em and I made scones and cookies first thing. Seb built some figures with his K'nex whilst Em compiled a list of books she wanted to read (including things like Wuthering Heights and Pride and Prejudice!!!!). I showed her how to use bullet points on word, how to change the style and from there she added colour/font and border changes.
At about 11 our guests arrived; R wither her children aged 6,4,2 and newborn. N and E are very good friends of Seb and they play so well together. They spent the day with playdough, watching little Einsteins, playing in the garden and also upstairs with all sorts of imaginative games. We had a put together lunch and R bought a friendship cake for us which we shared, plus a starter so we could make our own. Its been going for a while apparently so we'll try to continue passing the cake on.
They didn't leave until around 3 by which time, nice as it was to have company, I needed a lie down. Tea was a rather mixed affair. I threw together pasta cooked veg and chopped leftover chicken and mixed it with a yog/mayo and herb dressing which everyone seemed to like. So quick and easy though I must remember to do it again.
This evening I went out to cell group and was rather amused to come home and have dh tell me that Emma has decided to read Pride and Prejudice but has decided to read it slowly as it has lots of big words in it . So proud of her for even trying to tackle it though.

Back To It

2011-05-23T23:13:00.001+01:00

Before 8am this morning Seb had made a guitar out of cardboard, an inner tube from wrapping paper and some string, drawn a picture of a spear he wanted dh to make, built a couple lego cars and made a light out of pipecleaners for each of us to atach to our heads to look like angler fish with a light on its head - very imaginative, my boy!!

I guess you could say we were back into the swing of things again Im far too unmotivated today though which has made it hard to be the teacher. I keep getting myself distracted with wanting to play on the computer, watch tv, lay down etc and days like these make me dream of 6 hours to myself whilst kids are at school,lol.

Still, we got there in the end and all the kids did their set work with out too much angst (if you ingnore Abi and her maths work again ). Seb was done by 10.45am which meant I could step out of teacher mode and move into 'available-source-of-knowledge-sitting-in-the-corner-doing-her-own-thing' mode; by far my favourite mode to be in! . He played Lego Heros and watched Lego animations on the pc whilst the girls continued their work.

After lunch I finally dragged myself up and out the house so we could go to matalan and Tesco. Abi needed a bra with invisible straps to wear with her dress (didn't even know they existed!!), and I had to pick up some bits from Tesco. I also had to buy more new toothbrushes; apparently two people in the house with blue toothbrushes, even though they were different, was too difficult for Dh and nathan to cope with .

When we got home I did a few jobs (laundry, dishes, tidying etc) Whilst Seb and Em played with Lego and Abi went upstairs to do something. Amazon delivered our parcel shortly after much to Abi's disgust as it contained Maths stuff mostly; just revision guides, practice papers etc. plus a few Eva Ibbotson books and the next phonics book for Seb.

Tonight I did new potatoes, barbecue flavour chicken and corn on the cob for tea followed by some of our home-grown strawberries with clotted cream for pudding. We didn't think they were going to grow this year but suddenly we have a glut of them. Not that I am complaining,everyone loves them in our house. Tonight I let Seb stay up until 9 whilst I vacuumed and tidied ready for visitors tomorrow, plus trying to get him to sleep past 6am if its possible. I am just so tired of 6am, or earlier, starts.
Here's my anthem at the minute.

Time Out

2011-05-22T23:33:00.000+01:00

We have been having an impromptu mini holiday since Thursday. This was mainly because following Abi's birthday, we couldnt seem to get back into the groove. Instead we did some outdoorsy stuff and got caught up in the spring cleaning bug.
Friday
We woke and couldnt be bothered to do school so decided to go to Sherborne instead. It took some time to find the carpark we wanted; Sherborne is a maze of crazy streets that leave me completely confused. Eventually we did though, then spent the morning browsing the shops, admiring all the beautiful things and wanting to buy loads. We didnt though. *grin* Instead we went to the play park for a bit then to Sainsburys to buy lunch.

After that we nipped over to Sherborne Castle to check it out before the party we had there on Saturday. We spent Friday afternoon making spring cleaning plans and doing housework. The girls did their piano practice, spent some time in the garden and occupied Seb.

Saturday
I was awake before six so I went a little crazy and turned out the upstair cupboards, wardrobes and under beds and began sorting. We took a break for the DH to take the kids swimming whilst I went to buy washing powder from Tesco. I ended up carrying an 80 wash box of powder from there to Wilko to buy wicker baskets. Whilst in there I ended up nearly getting accused of shoplifting because of the powder, though the lady was fine about it when I showed her my receipt. We dashed home to do some more tidying then remembered the party that the children had been invited to so back into the car, back to Tesco to buy lunch then back to Sherborne Castle. We met up with L whose sons' birthday we were there to celebrate, H1, H2 and H3 and their respective children. It was all rather lovely with the kids playing well together whilst us adults got to sit and gossip for ages. The castle is in a lovely setting and was practically deserted so it was just us and all the kids.
Abi and Emma took some lovely mug-shots for me as I'd forgotten my camera.

We finally left at 3pm after long goodbyes, then headed home to do more tidying. The girls helped me with a lot of the sorting and lifting, Seb mostly occupied himself whilst I sorted through things, washed clothes, bedding curtains and goodness knows what we managed to keep all this time. Then began the long process of sorting all the junk into new homes. I went to the cinema with S in the evening to watch Pirates of the Carribean 4 but it turned out not to be as great as I hoped, although to be fair, it was late so maybe I'd just lost all interest by then. By the time I got home though it was clear I may have over done it so went straight to bed.
Sunday
I woke up at 5.30 to the chickens going a bit barmy whilst egg laying and Seb came in not much longer after that. After chatting to him for a while and printing out instructions for his lego model dh and I got up and threw ourselves into the rest of the cleaning and sorting. Between us we managed to get done 9 loads of washing inc. drying and folding, sorting and vac-packing spare bedding, changed and washed curtains, weeding the garden, pressure washing the garden walls, mowing the lawn, filing letters, listing on ebay and freecycle, cooking tea, and sorting out cupboards. Phew!! Felt so much better when it was done though.
I managed time to go to Church too and dh went to the allotment. This evening the older three took themselves off to bed so once Seb was in bed dh and I watched Morning Glory, which turned out to be a fab film.

15 Years!!

2011-05-19T21:04:00.001+01:00

Cant believe it that Abi is 15 today. Time has just flown and she has grown. Its rather surreal.

Happy Birthday Abi x

Here are some of the presents and cards she got as well as getting another new phone and £50 money.

And she wanted a lemon drizzle cake this year so I had to hurriedly make this yesterday evening and decorate this morning. Below it is her just blowing the candles out.

Due to her birthday and the fact she did exams this week we took the day off and instead went to town so she could spend her money. This afternoon they all just hung out in the garden and after tea we nipped to Asda. Other than that a much needed quiet day and I got to chill out and rest which I was grateful for.

Wet Wednesday

2011-05-18T19:06:00.000+01:00

The weather has turned wet and unpleasent so I'm kind of glad I've had nowhere to go today. First thing this morning we did normals (younger two) and I helped Abi with the last of her Math revision book. She'll go on to practice papers and a different revision book now.
DH finished work by 12 and came home to change and get lunch before it was time to take Abi to her exam. I spent the time making sure she had everything and was organised but she didn't seem to worried about her exam at all. Em went with dh to drop her off and whilst they were waiting for her they went around Clarks Village again, then to Morrisons.
Abi came out rather positive and seemed to have questions that she liked so now we just wait; until July I think. Its only 3.5 weeks until her Maths exam so now we need turn our attention to cramming and practicing for that. I was luckily able to sign up to the teachers site and access past papers. Not sure I am meant to be able to but I didn't lie and they still let me in so either they do that sort of thing or its their mistake.
This evening, after he'd been to beavers, I spent some time playing with Seb. He wanted to play some sort of random battle game with his new lego heros. That's something I never expected to be doing, but it was quite nice although I still struggle with that sort of stuff. Its all about learning how to parent boys.

Exams- ooooh!!!

2011-05-16T22:20:00.001+01:00

I dont have any photos to offer today. Its probably a good thing because at this rate I will use up all my free photo storage. Today was a bit of a big day as it was the first of Abi's exams - English. She had to be there at 9.10 for a nine-thirty start so we left extra early and went to Morrisons for Breakfast. Whilst she was sitting her exam we went to Clarks Village to look around and search out some bargains. DH managed to get some work gear for half price or less so was very impressed.
Abi came out of the exam smiling so thats a good sign, she has one more revision session tomorrow and an exam on Wednesday and then thats it until results time. Im trying not to be nervous for her but I know how much she wants Kingston Maurwood so would hate for her not to get the right results to do what she wants.
DH headed to work when we got home and I spent the afternoon feeling completely out of it and had a long bath then slept on the sofa for a good part of it, meaning the kids did no work at all, oops. The girls were lovely and did their Music practice and French homework, occupied Seb and did some tidying, dishes and sorted the chickens out for me whilst I was sleeping.
We had freezer meals for tea that I had pre-made, then I slept some more whilst dh took Abi to and from her church group, then took Seb and Emma to fetch a mixer he'd just won on Ebay. Of course now I've slept Im wide awake which was obviously going to happen. I think I will just have to grab sleep when I can at the minute because my body clock doesnt know what it's doing thanks to all the upsets and stress recently.

Bluebell Sunday

2011-05-15T19:44:00.006+01:00

Today we spent the day at Okehampton Castle for Bluebell Sunday. As a child my parents bought me here every year to see the jousting, the dancing and the crafts. We would climb the castle, walk back through old park to Simmons park then stop for ice cream before walking via Ball Hill, home. I always slept well that night!! Well, my parents live in town these days so thankfully we had less far to walk but we did enjoy a lovely day there. Nathan didnt want to come and was out the night before so we left before he got back and the drive down was quite good despite Ten Tors, actually getting home was no problem either.

Seb at the castle entrance.

Lovely picture near the kitchen area.

On the wall of the banquet hall.

Emma on the walls between what was probably the bed chambers.

Two Towers,lol.

Too the upper chambers.

On the balcony.

Bluebell walk.

The river by the castle.

DH (on the right) having a go at fencing.

And the kids having a go with the equipment too.

River crossing to Old Park.

A view up stream.

We spent around 3 hours there then headed to the park to try and get icecream. Sadly the facilities aren't what they used to be - apparently modernisation equals less not more and there were 6 icecreams to choose from, none I liked. So the kids got icecream and we went back to my parents for a late lunch, spent a while there and headed home.

What We Did Instead . . .

2011-05-13T22:28:00.001+01:00

I had to deal with some unkindness at French on Thursday which left me worse for wear and I hadn't really recovered well enough to go to HEY today. Intead I pulled a sicky and chilled out at home.

Seb woke up early again, by that I mean as always! He played learning ladder on the pc first thing then spent some time on a mission on club penguin. The electrician came at nine to wire in our new shower unit and Seb spent most of the next three hourse whatching him work, passin tools and climbing up and down the loft ladder. He had a short go with N darts and dartboard and made up a puppet show for me with his small cuddly toys.
Emma and Abi woke later and spent some time in the garden looking at the tadoles; one has begun to grow its back legs and the others aren't too fat behind. Then Emma did her normals; mapwork, reading, english, math, music, lapbook Meanwhile Abi spent 3 hours on her math revision for her GCSE and her music practice as that exam is coming up soon too.

The plumber finally finished and we ate a quick lunch before nipping out to do some shopping. First stop was Tesco which took longer than usual as Seb wanted to watch them making bread. Whilst he was glued to that Abi and Emma went to drop some books off to the library and bought tops from primark. Abi needed a black one for Grease Night at youth, and Emma needed a long sleeved white one just because! We met back at the car and went to Watermarque to buy some more pondweed for our tadpoles. Its all very exciting for the kids seeing the tadpoles change this way.

Once home I made Meatloaf loaf for tea and slept for about an hour or so whilst it cooked. Meatloaf is best rested so took that out to cool and somehow fell asleep again - I must have needed it. I woke up in time to cook tea which was ready just as dh walked through the door. ( I swear, no matter what time I start tea he always seems to be here in time for it!!!)
I decided on Mcflurry for pudding (yes, I do, know how much crap is in those things) so we went via there on the way to dropping Emma at scouts. After a dash back from scouts we put Seb to bed by which time I had aquired a headache that was so bad I could hardly stand so took myself to bed. Managed to sleep for a bit but woke up feeling nauseous and have been awake since then so have dosed myself with paracetamol and am lying in a dim room with Kool 'n' Sooth on my forehead hoping to feel better soon :/

Just another day...

2011-05-11T21:28:00.129+01:00

Merry over at Patch of Puddles is hosting a Typical HE Day in photos on her blog and asked if I fancied making a contribution. Every seasoned HEer knows that most HE days aren't typical and if there is a pattern to your day, its so unique to your family its impossible to replicate fully. Whats funny is that as a new HEer, old hands would tell me that and I wouldn't quite believe them..... until I was an old hand too :)
Hope you enjoy a snapshot of a 'typical' HE day.

Early start (6am, eeek) and a quick go on Club Penguin, Super Why and Poisson Rouge,

Playing castle attack with his knights and guards.

Breakfast whilst watching Alphablocks and Numberjacks

Abi doing Math revision (only picture I got of her today. She spent the rest of it reading, doing GCSE English revision, outside in the garden drawing, taking photos and writing)

Em finally got up and did some Normals; math, english and science workbooks.

Real Learning: watching the plumber install our new shower.

Reading his Oxford Reading Tree book to daddy.

Making 10 - Math is his main lesson book.

Playing Indiana Jones in the garden with the daycare kid.

Working on her botany lapbook which we got from here.

After lunch reading. Sonlight reader - The Little Princess.

Rebuilding and playing a game with his Lego police boat. The white thing is apparently a saw thing that he saw on Goonies.

Music practice - ready for grade 2 practical exam.

Observing Caterpillars.

Collecting eggs.

Learning about life cycles.

Zooming on his scooter.

Playing a game together.

A Lego vehicle.

Book People delivery.

A plane using the boxes from the books.

And there you have it. At times it looks like all we do is book work when I blog. But actually, in reality, our days are mostly like this; full of random opportunities, ideas and a whole load of imagination.

Papercrafts and Imagination.

2011-05-10T23:52:00.039+01:00

Well the original post got eaten by blogger - bad blogger!!!!!!

So looks like I have to start all over again. DH took Abi to Bicton in my car rather than the van in the name of saving petrol so we had an at-home day today.It would have been the perfect day for a HE photoblog had I remembered to take photos of everything. First thing this morning we got started on Normals which was our usual round of bits that they always do; workbooks, music, reading etc. After that Seb took himself off and spent the rest of the morning creating and making various papercrafts:
Some cowboys that seb drew with the help of an Usborne book.Apparently the smaller one has big guns and the bigger one has small guns. So now you know,lol.

This is a claw that apparently Seb saw on a power rangers' advert. All superheros need them you know. I helped to cut the shape which he stuck and coloured.

This is a gooey monster sleeping in a gooey bog apparently.

This is Sebs Sky remote control for when he has a sky box and can watch whatever he wants.

This fab little collection is Sebs very imaginative attempt at Harry Potter figures. The top small figures on the left are Dumbledore and Sirrius Black. Underneath is Ron , Harry (complete with scar) and Hermoine. The large figure is Hagrid, with Fang bottom right. The top right-hand blobs are dementors. Bet you cant guess what we are listening to on audiobook in the car? LOL

This is apparently a map for treasue hunting. it has lots of different ways but only one is the right way apparently.

As well as all this there were lego games and outside play, all fun stuff.In the afternoon Emma and I made an Elderflower and apple rice pudding for tea and the three off us made chocolate cheesecake ready for tomorrow.

All in all a busy, lovely day.